Engagement - the traditions of Russia, is an engagement necessary, what is it and how to organize it. What does "engaged" or "engaged" mean: a stamp in the passport, social status, or just a convention? How long does it take between proposal and engagement?

Often in in social networks you can see the status "engaged" or "engaged" in the profile of a user. You can hear about this in real life. However, not everyone knows, trying to interpret this with many incorrect guesses. By the way, often on the Internet and in real life this concept differs in meaning and perception, which misleads users of the World Wide Web.

And some even believe that the status of "engaged" simply means that the lady is not free, that she has a boyfriend. And yet what does "engaged" or "engaged" mean in social networks and in real life?

What is an engagement

In general, the engagement is the day when the lovers firmly decide to get married, however, in Russia, the engagement is considered the day the application is submitted to the registry office, after which the young people are given a month to think and prepare for the wedding. From the day of the engagement, the couple can already be called the bride and groom. The groom usually gives the bride for engagement golden decoration(most often a ring) as a sign of the seriousness of their intentions. At the engagement, it is customary to inform relatives and friends about your decision (spread rumors, as they say), and after submitting an application to the registry office, arrange a festive reception. Usually, the reception on such an occasion is modest and not particularly solemn, which cannot be said about the same traditions in the West, and even about the traditions of our ancestors.

A bit of history

In Russia, it was customary to arrange an engagement before the wedding, and it was necessary to do this. The whole process of marriage included matchmaking, then engagement, and only then betrothal. So, after the father of the future bride agreed to the request for the hand of his daughter, the young have the right to think about marriage.

Having decided to get married, they must first of all inform their parents about this and arrange a meeting for them in order to discuss in a close family circle all the nuances of the upcoming wedding, as well as the future family life(place and time of the celebration, number of guests, where and how the newlyweds will live, etc.).

The groom's parents were invited to the bride's house under any pretext other than the true one, and received them there with honors and bows. The groom was supposed to come to visit not empty-handed, but to give the bride a handkerchief, a ring or other gold jewelry. The bride herself was absent at the same time, but at the end of the evening she went out, accepted gifts and herself gave something valuable to her future spouse. Such an interesting custom was called conspiracy. From the day of the agreement until the wedding itself, the groom was not supposed to see the bride. By the way, in our time, often everything goes according to the same scenario. After collusion, the couple submits an application to the registry office. And then you can already "start a rumor" about the upcoming wedding among friends and celebrate the engagement itself. That's what "engaged" or "engaged" really means.

Engaged on the Internet

Recently, it has become fashionable in social networks to indicate the status of "engaged" or "engaged" in your profile. What this position means is understandable, but often such a status is simply put by those couples whose relationship lasts long enough, and this does not at all imply that they are in the premarital period. Therefore, on the Internet, you should not particularly trust the questionnaires and the data indicated in them, but you just need to directly ask the couple about their marital status.

Now, knowing what “engaged” and “engaged” mean, it’s worth considering: don’t throw empty words into the wind, telling everyone around about a non-existent marital status, it’s better to just take action to back up your words with deeds!

The engagement consists in the announcement of the young that they have decided to become husband and wife. As a rule, during this period, the bride and groom decide on preparations for the wedding, prepare for the upcoming married life. It is during this period that they can still abandon their decision. The engagement ceremony is a very beautiful tradition, which you need to know about and take into account all the subtleties of its implementation.

Traditionally, the engagement (formerly handshaking) follows the matchmaking and precedes the betrothal, and is an important moment in pre-wedding preparations. This rite expresses the seriousness and importance of your relationship. If you are not sure about your desire to start a family with this particular person, you should not announce your engagement just because your friends did it. Today, of course, this rite is more conventional and not a mandatory necessity, it is treated as an outdated formality or beautiful custom which precedes the main moment in life. Whereas before, after the handshake, the wedding simply could not fail. Only extraordinary circumstances, war or natural disasters could interfere with the wedding. And in pre-Petrine times, the violation of collusion was equated with insulting the bride, and the stipulated documents even indicated an impressive amount for refusing to marry.

As a rule, the day of filing an application with the registry office is the day of the engagement. After that, the couple has only a month to really decide for themselves whether this marriage is necessary, whether I want to connect my fate with this person, so as not to regret what happened later.

The parents of the bride and groom should be the first to know about the engagement of their children - this is the main condition for this ceremony. According to Russian tradition future husband asks for the hand of his beloved from her father. By the way, this custom has its roots in the deep past, when a man was the head of the family, and this status was unshakable.

As a rule, the bride and groom organize a meeting of parents from both sides to discuss the details of the future wedding (determine the number and composition of guests, venue, organization of the wedding, discuss possible options for helping parents to the newlyweds at first, etc.).

As soon as the consent of the parents to the marriage is received, and the application is submitted to the registry office, this event can be celebrated by arranging, for example, a gala dinner, at which the engagement and the proposed date of the wedding are announced. You can celebrate this event anywhere, it all depends on your imagination and financial condition. If you have plans to draw up and sign a marriage contract, then this event is the best suited for this. From this moment on, the couple can be called the bride and groom.

In the old days, the parents of the bride appointed the agreed day and time. Often the groom's parents were invited to the bride's house for some holiday under various pretexts, while they were not told a word about the true reasons for the celebration. The groom himself, his parents and close relatives gathered at the bride's house with gifts. In the bride's house, guests were received with all sorts of honors, they bowed to each other and exchanged gifts. A gift to the bride could be in the form of a ring, scarf, gold jewelry, etc. Previously, according to custom, the bride was absent during the conspiracy, but at the end of the evening, on behalf of the bride, one of her relatives brought gifts for the groom and his relatives. As a rule, the bride gave the groom an embroidered shirt, sewn with her own hands. From the agreement to the wedding, regardless of the length of the terms, the groom did not have the right to see the bride. The terms from collusion to marriage could be different, from a week to several months, depending on the circumstances. Later, the custom of not seeing the bride disappeared; the groom could see the bride at any time after the engagement. Before the rite of handshaking, the groom could see the bride only during the bride. It is worth noting that in any public place in the presence of people the couple could see each other, but no meetings in private before parental blessing were impossible.

The guests were seated in places of honor under the shrine. For several minutes, guests and hosts sat in silence - this was required by the then customs. At the table, the bride's father announced the engagement in the form of a short speech-toast, ending with a toast. The bride and groom sat side by side at the table, on the right hand of the bride were the groom's parents, left hand groom - bride's parents. For the engagement, the bride wore a light festive dress, and the groom wore a formal suit. Then the so-called line record was written, which indicated the names of the newlyweds, the expected date of the wedding, the groom's obligation to marry the bride, the obligations of the bride's relatives to marry her and give her a certain dowry (literally everything was entered), as well as possible "fines", a penalty or backwards for failure to fulfill duties, etc. . The party that went back down had to pay the amount, the amount of which would correspond to the state. This amount has always been so great that the burden fell on the shoulders of the violator. Also, it was not uncommon for a condition to be entered in a line record that the husband should not beat his wife so that he could recover for the offense.

On the occasion of the engagement in rich Russian families, the parents of the bride arranged balls with plentiful refreshments. Invitations to the celebration were made in the form of special tickets and sent to those invited, sometimes older family members advertised in newspapers that announced this joyful event. Close relatives, acquaintances and influential people were invited to the ball, where the head of the family officially introduced the bride and groom to everyone.

Although engagements could take place quite at home, without inviting guests. AT this case the parents themselves or the priest who was invited to this event blessed the bride and groom with an icon, and the families exchanged bread and salt. The fathers of the future husband and wife made seven bows to each other and called the wedding date. If the bride's father died, then his brother, or godfather or other male relative took his place. After receiving a parental blessing, the bride and groom traditionally exchanged rings. From that moment on, the young were considered engaged.

According to an old Russian tradition, on the day of the engagement, the groom as a sign strong love presents the bride with an engagement ring, usually with one or more precious stones. On this ring, on its inner side, the groom ordered an engraving of the date of engagement. In addition, the initials of the groom were indicated on the bride's ring, and the bride's on the groom's ring. If the bride accepts the ring, this indicates a confirmation of the intentions of both to marry. If the bride rejects the groom's marriage proposal, then she refuses the ring presented to her. The choice of the ring is up to the groom, there are no special rules, it all depends on certain preferences. Usually, wedding ring the bride wears before the wedding on the ring finger of her right hand, and on the wedding day she takes it off before meeting the groom. Then it can be worn over wedding ring, and if the marriage is successful, pass on by inheritance.

Engagement in tradition different countries.
In each country, the engagement ceremony had its own characteristics. So, for example, in Germany, it symbolized the beginning of marital relations. Immediately after the betrothal, the couple began to live, as it is now commonly called, civil marriage. Moreover, this period for a young couple could last more than one year. During this time, the newlyweds established the degree of compatibility and "built" a warm and cozy nest.

In Italy, this rite was understood as preparation for the wedding, while the groom, until the wedding, was only allowed to visit the bride sometimes within the walls of her house under the obligatory supervision of her parents.

In Japan, the bride and groom met precisely at the engagement, since the marriage took place by agreement of the parents. It was considered an official ceremony at which, if the groom's intentions regarding the observance of all formalities were serious, he presented the bride with nine gifts as a gift. If the groom refused to comply with the formalities, he gave fewer gifts. At the same time, the groom's relatives presented future relatives with material compensation and gifts with wishes of good luck. Native brides, for their part, had to give gifts to future relatives in an amount that was half the amount received. Today in Japan, this custom is observed less and less, and grooms give rings to their lovers in the European manner.

In Switzerland, after the engagement, the young had to have a conversation with the priest, which was a kind of test for readiness for married life.

In Spain, a couple could call off their engagement if the wedding dragged on for more than three months.

In Islamic countries, according to Sharia, the engagement is the moment the bride is introduced to the groom, when he is allowed to see her face and exchange a few phrases, but only in the obligatory presence of her relatives. You can not touch the bride before marriage.

Engagement for a young couple is a test period in which they test each other's reliability and ability to support. This period shows how strong the trust of the bride and groom for each other, whether they understand each other, whether they can accept each other's habits and shortcomings. This is the time when a couple finally decides for themselves whether to remain free or seal their relationship with marriage.

During the engagement, the young are announced as the bride and groom. Engagement begins with a mutual decision to marry. It lasts until the wedding itself, as a rule, 3-6 months. At the request of the parties, this process may end earlier or later. In the engagement device Active participation hosted by the bride's parents. Relatives and close friends are invited to the engagement, but they do not say the reason for the invitation, they simply urge them to come on such and such a day, at such and such an hour to dine. Moreover, all the invitees either know or guess for what reason they are invited, but they pretend to be completely ignorant. This is the rule of the wedding script. If the engagement takes place in the house of people who are not poor and believers, then, of course, they invite a priest. The engagement is not legally binding and can be easily terminated at any time.
Before the engagement, the future bride and groom will get to know each other's families. According to Russian custom, a man must “ask for the hand” of his chosen one from her father and mother. The parents of the future newlyweds meet after the matchmaking, before the official announcement of the engagement. If they don't already know each other, the initiative should be taken by the groom's family, which pays a visit to the bride's parents. Usually this meeting takes place in a narrow circle: it is not attended by distant relatives or friends. The visit is agreed in writing or by phone.

Engagement is an ancient custom that usually precedes a wedding. This tradition is more than two thousand years old, and today - however, in a very modified form - it is supported by many couples in love.

Previously, engagement or betrothal was practically equated with marriage. The rupture of relations after the engagement was condemned, it could even be accompanied by the payment of a “forfeit” to the “injured party”. The culture of different countries has always had its own peculiarities of engagement. For example, in the peasant families of Westphalia, the young, after the engagement, entered into marital relations. In Italy, on the contrary, the betrothed could meet and talk only in the house of the bride, under the watchful eye of her parents. In some places in Spain, the period from betrothal to marriage was from three weeks to three months. A longer period could be grounds for terminating the engagement. But in the cities of Germany, years could pass from engagement to wedding. This is explained by the fact that, according to custom, the young had to start life together in a separate house, having everything you need. It took time to acquire this property.

Nowadays, the engagement is not an official event. Therefore, you yourself can choose whether it will follow the application to the registry office or immediately after the marriage proposal. You can arrange big celebration in the circle of relatives of both sides, with the exchange of gifts, discussion of plans for the wedding. In addition, the engagement is a great occasion to introduce the parents of the bride and groom. And you can arrange a romantic holiday just for two. But in any case, the traditional gift of the groom - an engagement ring - remains relevant. You can act in an original way by hiding the ring in a flower bud, in a dessert or at the bottom of a wine glass, or you can simply present a box, accompanying this gesture gentle words and beautiful music.

Even in the event of an annulment of the engagement, the ring is not accepted to be returned. This ring is usually worn only before the wedding on the ring finger of the right hand, and is removed on the wedding day. When family life develops happily, it is traditionally passed on to children or grandchildren. The engagement is not only the beginning of the "trial period" before the wedding, but also one of the most romantic and unforgettable holidays.

From time immemorial, matchmaking preceded the beginning of wedding celebrations in Russia. Over time, some elements of the customs borrowed from our Western neighbors have firmly settled in our lives. The traditional European engagement tradition has become commonplace for most newlyweds and their relatives. The ongoing engagement becomes not only a public announcement of a future wedding, but will also be a way to set parents up for the upcoming event in the lives of children, an opportunity for mutual disclosure of their intentions. What is an engagement and what are the features of a beautiful and touching engagement? Our article will answer these questions.

The origins of the tradition of holding

The ancient Egyptians first introduced the rule of wearing a wedding ring on the ring finger. There was a belief that in this place there is an artery leading directly to the heart. Therefore, the bride or groom constantly remembered their beloved.

A metal ring was given to the girl's parents by the groom in ancient Rome. Thus, the obligation was confirmed never to offend and to keep children and wife in abundance.

In the Middle Ages, gold items were given, if possible framed with diamonds. Such stones magical powers became a talisman of the feelings of lovers and kept the young couple from any intrigues of evil forces.

You can generally answer the rhetorical question of what an engagement is, with one phrase - this is a kind of rite of connection for a couple and an oath to each other in the upcoming marriage. The canonical interpretation involves asking the girl's hand from her parents. The standard period between this event and the wedding is usually six months, but there are also more significant periods of time. The final date is influenced by factors such as preparation for the celebration and its scale. For all its officiality, an engagement cannot be a 100% guarantee of a marriage and can be terminated by one of the parties at any time. In most Western countries, this custom is honored to this day. Young people make the decision and make an announcement about it. Classic variant- the request of the groom's hands of the girl from the parents. As a result of the agreement, a luxurious banquet is appointed with the invitation of relatives and close friends who, until the last moment, do not know about the purpose of the upcoming event. And only, after gathering all the guests, they will learn about the reason for the celebration.

Features of engagement in Russia

There are no clearly defined rules. Usually everything looks like a meeting of relatives from the side of the bride and groom. During the acquaintance, all the nuances of the material and organizational plan of wedding events are discussed in detail. Handshaking - this is how a similar event was called in the old days, at which the parties, in agreement, hit each other on the hands. At the present time, not everyone is able to give diamond rings. What kind of engagement ring grooms give today has ceased to excite the girls. Both models with pebbles and carved rings are presented. It is becoming very popular to combine the engagement and filing an application with the marriage registration authorities on the same day. Almost everyone celebrates such an event. And everyone chooses the decision to celebrate on a grand scale or in a modest home environment. The tradition of informing parents about the upcoming wedding at a banquet has not taken root in our open spaces. In Russian realities, they prefer to notify mom and dad in advance so as not to cause them moral stress, and also to receive financial assistance if possible. Yes, and the option that last moment the hostility of the girl's relatives to the groom, also should not be discounted. In this case, there will be time to convince the older generation of the seriousness and correctness of the choice made. There are couples who do not advertise their intentions until the wedding itself. And in this there is no disregard for relatives and guests. Thus, it is possible to avoid publicity in case of a potential disruption of the wedding. And with the sounds of a solemn march, you can loudly announce your joy.

Best engagement options

There are many ways that will be appropriate in holding such a significant event: - not everyone will be able to afford an engagement on a grand scale on the eve of a costly wedding event. Nothing terrible will happen if this event does not take place in an expensive restaurant and without a fashionable toastmaster. An economical home party with the closest people will allow you to listen to congratulations and discuss the wedding plan. The order of the rites Ancient Russia best supervised by a professional. On the table in such an environment, pies, pancakes and other dishes will organically look. The toastmaster will skillfully pause at the right moment, and the toast of each of the guests will fit into the overall scenario of the celebration. In the same spirit, a wedding ceremony can take place; - do not think that holding in the European style necessarily implies very large financial expenses. Buffet and a small selection of cocktails can be arranged at home. In this case, an advance invitation with confirmation of its receipt becomes mandatory. The Western version involves the presentation of modest gifts for the young by the guests. But the groom should think in advance about what kind of ring they give to the engagement girl. Indeed, according to Western rules, the presentation of a diamond gold ring will be mandatory; - if you have a cottage, there are many options for holding theme party. It offers amazing vistas of noisy and bright holiday in the style of retro, cowboy rodeo, medieval aristocratic castle or pirate brotherhood. If finances allow, a prestigious beach, a cottage in the forest or a board of a luxury yacht becomes the venue. Important nuances of the organizational plan. There are several issues that require special attention when planning such a crucial moment in the life of a young couple: - Notifying parents depends entirely on how much the lovers know their closest people. If you are absolutely confident in them, then you can take the risk and surprise all the guests by announcing the wedding already at the party itself. - It is considered bad form to invite to the engagement of those whom you do not plan to invite to the wedding event later. You can face very great resentment on their part. - There are several ways to thank everyone who responded to your invitation. Express your gratitude in your toast to friends who responded or send thank you cards after the event is over. - It is advisable to leave a memory of what is happening by capturing it on camera or taking pictures. - You should not dry your head to fit the engagement to a certain date or make it look like some other. Your event should be absolutely unique and celebrated in a way that suits you best. Another rule is a warning about which table awaits guests. For example, if only sweets are planned, invitees can grab a bite to eat before leaving, knowing that dessert is waiting for them.

Features of choosing an engagement ring

Often, young people do not bother to collect information about this important point. Of course, a girl will be pleased to receive any gift from her lover, but do not forget about some rules. The engagement ring should be with a stone. The presence of a diamond on it is desirable, but not always young people have the opportunity of such an acquisition, so the central stone can be: sapphire, ruby, tanzanite. The main thing lies elsewhere - this jewel should be different from the wedding option. The tradition of wearing a ring on the ring finger of the left hand is accepted in the West. But we prefer to place it on the right hand, where a little later the engagement ring will be placed. The girl wears two rings at the same time, but it is desirable that, with an external difference, they should be made of gold of the same type. In any case, it will not interfere with right choice advice from a future mother-in-law or bridesmaid. Their presence in our showroom during the purchase process will be ideal. The absence of strict restrictions leads to the most unexpected ways of offering from Russian suitors. Some people buy the first product that comes across and are not very worried about which finger it will fit on. Others immediately acquire a wedding ring, wear it on their left hand and simply move it to the other hand at the registry office. After all, for a long time there was no tradition of gifts when offering a hand and heart. It was believed that the bride should be satisfied with the very fact of the request, and the groom with a satisfactory answer.

What is the difference between engagement and betrothal

The widespread opinion that these concepts are absolutely identical is not entirely correct. The decision to marry and give the ring does not exclude some differences. There are many ways to "say" that a couple of lovers from a certain point on will be called the bride and groom. The main options are an agreement between young people or a meeting with friends and parents from both sides. But the betrothal cannot take place without the ring from the chosen one or the presence of the bride and groom at the same time. Usually this ceremony takes place under the shadow of the church. Christian traditions. The significance of the solemn event for believers is very great. Breaking this vow is considered a sinful act. From ancient times in Russia it was believed that the vow given in the church and the exchange of rings was an oath that could not be broken under any circumstances. In the event that there was no betrothal, and the young couple wants to get married, the ceremony before entering the temple is performed in a simplified form. For people with an atheistic worldview, the difference between these events is leveled. They always have the opportunity to change their mind.

Many wonderful and, one might say, reasonable traditions, unfortunately, are becoming a thing of the past. It's sad, but that's the reality of today. However, in some areas in our country, and not only, the old foundations are still preserved. Some of them are engagement and betrothal. What it is, how it differs, how it happens and where it happens, read on.

Traditions and rules of engagement

The significant and beautiful Russian ceremony of engagement, popularly called it the word "conspiracy", was the most significant pre-wedding custom in Ancient Russia. The current engagement in Russia has literally nothing to do with the ancient ceremony, however, the meaning of this action has remained unchanged.

Several centuries ago in Orthodox Church the sacrament of betrothal was held, which in essence was the very engagement as it is in the modern sense. Also, the order was separated by a certain time interval from the wedding, since it preceded it. In our time, both the betrothal and the wedding in the church are combined into one sacrament and take place simultaneously.

Engagement for young people means the announcement of the future newlyweds as the bride and groom, the publication of their mutual consent to the marriage. At present, the engagement of our compatriots takes place when the bride and groom jointly submit an application to the registry office. Also, this ceremony is needed so that those who will soon become newlyweds have time to make sure that the choice is made correctly, and how to prepare for a large-scale wedding celebration.

According to secular law, marriage registration takes place after a month from the date of filing a joint application with the appropriate institution. In rare cases, when circumstances so require, registration can be carried out earlier than a month.

In general, the real state of affairs is such that most registry offices are very overloaded with a huge number of registrants, for this reason they begin to accept applications there sometimes in one and a half, and sometimes even two months. In such situations, it is desirable to find out the specifics of the procedure in a particular wedding palace.

What does it mean to be engaged

The status of a man "engaged" refers to a man's personal relationship. If he is engaged, then it says that he is:

  • not single;
  • intends to marry the woman he has chosen;
  • by announcing his status, he to some extent asks the others not to disturb or worry.

The engagement, in fact, is needed not for those who are announced as preparing for the wedding, but for those around them. Most often, the question of whether a man is engaged, and what engagement means, worries women interested in him. Is there any hope for a reunion, how serious is it, and so on. These questions cannot be answered unambiguously here. After all, marriages break up. But we can say with certainty that trying to “take away” an engaged man is equal to taking a man away from the family.

Stage of preparation for the wedding

Of course, for today's newlyweds, filing an application is, without exaggeration, an indisputable evidence that the wedding celebration will take place. And the time from the engagement to the main celebration for them is a period of careful preparation for the wedding, which is associated with a lot of pre-wedding troubles.

How exactly to relate to the engagement, how to celebrate, and whether to celebrate at all, or to ignore and not celebrate this event in any way - this is the individual choice of the bride and groom. This event does not carry any legal force and, by and large, is only a public statement of people about their intention, nothing more. However, in any case, the fact filing an application for marriage at the registry office is an event that reinforces the seriousness of the goals of the young. So why not beautifully celebrate this event with your closest people?

Most often there is a symbiosis of these two phenomena. But they can also exist separately. An engagement is a public announcement that two people are planning to start a family, and it's only a matter of time. The disclosure of this fact precedes the wedding.

Betrothal is almost a sacrament of the past. In some service books, there is still a separate rank of betrothal. According to this rite, the priest puts on the rings to the newlyweds, saying: "The servant of God is betrothed to the servant of God." A betrothed man and woman could, for example, show affection for each other without judgment from those around them. Everyone knew that they were practically spouses.

Finally, the status of spouses in society was given to them by the wedding. In this case, the engagement could be terminated. At this stage, if any insurmountable circumstances arose, it was still possible to terminate the relationship. After the wedding, it was practically impossible to terminate the relationship and receive a blessing from the church community for this. This could be preceded only by such grave events for family life as:

  • betrayal of one of the spouses (and with a lack of remorse);
  • the departure of one of the spouses to a different faith and an attempt to captivate the rest of the family there.

The rules of wedding etiquette suggest that the spouses introduce their parents before the engagement begins. Moreover, it should not be an unexpected surprise for parents - before applying to the registry office by the future newlyweds in good form is considered a visit to the groom the bride's parents with a request to consent to marriage (this is a kind of current variety). For the groom's parents, the engagement should also not come as a complete surprise.

At present, the question of how to get engaged is quite natural. The answer is: as it turns out, as you like, in any suitable decent way. There is no specific scenario for this. Or is it some records on the Internet of those who held such a celebration on their own. Most often, a modern engagement takes place simply as a family dinner or lunch. Traditionally, at the festival, in addition to the perpetrators of the event, there are their parents (this is mandatory) and, if there is a desire of the young, close relatives and friends. In a solemn atmosphere, those present are informed about the upcoming event.

According to the rules of the engagement, the betrothed, as a rule, presents the bride with a ring, not yet gold, but from some precious metal, sometimes with precious stone. It is a symbol of love and a kind of marriage promise. It precedes the golden ring, which, as you know, wears only lawful spouse or spouse.

The bride usually wears an engagement ring on her ring finger. But she can choose any hand, since there are no clear appointments in this regard.

After the wedding, the young spouse, if desired, can be worn next to the wedding on the same finger or moved to another. Giving is not a duty, but rather a tradition. It can easily be replaced by some other valuable gift. The betrothed, in turn, is also free to give the groom some meaningful gift. Do it or not, she decides on her own.

The absence of an engagement ring means absolutely nothing. You should not be offended by this, consider it a bad sign, and generally attach some importance to it. These are just formalities, and completely optional.

What does the ring symbolize

Ring from ancient times is an indicator of power. And until now, this symbolism is present, and not only in the wedding and preceding ceremonies, but also:

  • in the underworld (seals);
  • in monarchical circles (monarchs wear them as a sign of power).

The ring on the groom's finger belongs to his bride, agreeing to wear it, he thereby agrees to show others his status as a single man. He also confirms that some of his decisions depend not only on him alone, but also on the consent of the one who gives him this ring.

The same applies to a girl: the ring on her finger belongs to a man, she wears it, showing that she is busy and obeys of her own free will to a loved one, her future or present spouse. This is the meaning of rings..

The role of parents

And in ancient times, on the day of the engagement, the parents of the future newlyweds discussed and settled a number of organizational issues that are related to the upcoming wedding. Today, this is not required at all. Some questions from participants the upcoming celebration can be decided not only on the day of the engagement, but also when they want:

  • when to start discussing pre-wedding affairs;
  • determination of the wedding budget;
  • the contribution of each party;
  • expected number of guests;
  • wedding venue.

Engagement day alone with your loved one

You can hold an engagement without any witnesses at all, just alone with your loved one and without being tied to the time of filing an application with the registry office. It’s only worth considering that the word “engagement” comes from the word “rumor”: its meaning was that everyone was announced that two people had decided to get married, and that each of them was busy and unavailable to start some new relationship.

After all, if a girl was made an offer, and she agreed to it, this means that the decision has already been made, and it is not affected by any invented conventions and rules.

If, due to some events or the wedding is canceled, then the engagement is considered broken off, and, according to tradition, each of the parties returns to each other all valuable gifts presented as a gift for the engagement.