The blessing of the mother of the bride (as well as the parents of the groom) is a very beautiful ceremony that came to us from antiquity. Then it was given great importance. If the words of the bride's mother's blessing were not uttered, before the bride and groom were not allowed to get married in the church. In addition, the girl was disinherited and shamed in society.

Nowadays, the words of the blessing of the mother of the bride no longer have such significance, but the parental parting word still plays a big role for the newlyweds. It's always nice to hear the appropriate words, don't you agree?

Parting words. Blessing of the mother of the bride in front of the registry office. Parents' words

Parents bless their children before entering the banquet hall. This is already happening after the newlyweds are greeted with a loaf, wine, bread and salt.

However, this version of the ceremony is simplified. Some families still prefer to revere ancient traditions. According to them, the bride should hear parting words. The blessing of the mother of the bride in front of the registry office, the words of the parents - all this should happen twice. The first time was just before the wedding. This is done in the father's house before leaving for the registry office. Moreover, the parents of the bride and groom bless their children separately. Then the young can already go to the painting. The second blessing is in the banquet hall.

What icon is used to bless the bride

One of the most revered images of the Mother of God is still our ancestors believed in her magic and miraculous power. It is she who is of particular importance for the fair sex, especially for the bride. Before the registry office, the mother must necessarily bless her daughter with the icon of the Mother of God.

Seeing the bride in the registry office

Seeing off at the registry office is a special ritual that the father must perform. The groom should not be around, everything should go only between the bride's parents and the bride herself. Parting words are spoken, the girl is blessed with the icon of the Mother of God.

What icon is used to bless the groom

The Bridegroom is Blessed This is the most common depiction of Christ. In one hand he holds a book, and with the other hand he blesses the person who looks at him. The Savior is asked that prosperity reign in the family. Previously, it was this icon that was brought into the house of the spouses first. Now the groom's parents use it to bless their son for a happy marriage.

Parting words for the groom before the registry office

While the bride receives a blessing from her parents, the groom also has his own ritual in the house. The table is covered with a white tablecloth. Bread is placed on it, salt and water, a burning candle are placed nearby. The groom kneels down and receives a blessing from his parents. The father takes his son by the hand and circles him three times around the set table. The mother should follow them, holding the icon of the Savior and a candle in her hands. Thus, the son receives support not only from his parents, but also from his entire family. After that, the groom can go for the bride.

mother of the bride

Who will keep the loaf? Who will say parting words to the newlyweds? Who contact them first? A lot of time is spent on distributing these roles. Although it is worth noting that there is no single rule in this regard. Consider several options for the distribution of roles (we go from left to right).

Possible options

The icon is held by the father of the groom, next to the loaf is the mother of the bride. Other parents just sit around

The mothers of the newlyweds hold icons, and the fathers hold champagne and loaf

In the hands of one mother - an icon, the other - a loaf. Fathers just stand on the sides

One mother has a loaf, the other has a fold. Fathers stand on their sides and hold glasses of champagne in their hands

Words of parental blessing to the bride and groom

The blessing of the mother of the bride at the wedding is a very important ritual. However, it doesn't really matter much what is said. It is much more important that all the words come from the heart, so that the parting words are sincere. Only then will the children be truly happy, and a life filled with happiness, joy and children's laughter will await ahead.

What they usually want:

well-being in the family,

many years of happy marriage,

health for the newlyweds and their children,

happiness in your own home.

By the way, the bride and groom should receive the words of blessing not only from their parents, but also from each other's parents. There is a belief that such an alliance will only become even stronger. It is not for nothing that after the wedding, young people call each other's parents "mom" and "dad".

What should the bride and groom do with icons after the wedding

The bride must definitely keep the icon that her mother blessed before painting. The groom should do the same. Newlyweds should keep them in their home as valuable. Usually they are wrapped in a towel and hidden away from prying eyes. This is a personal value, this is the blessing of the parents.

Icons cannot be held with bare hands. They say it's a bad omen. Therefore, it is very important not to forget to buy towels. The newlyweds will then be able to cover the icons with them and put them in their special place in the house. In addition, the towel is useful for the loaf.

According to an old custom, parents must first cross the bride and groom with the icon three times before the registry office, then the children kiss the icon. The same rite is repeated in the banquet hall. This custom is rarely followed today. However, if this is important for future spouses, then it is better to follow all the rules.

If it was decided that in the banquet hall the icon would be in the hands of one of the fathers, then it would be better to explain to him in advance all the details of the upcoming ritual. The fact is that men do not always pay special attention to this and can get confused at the most inopportune moment.

When the newlyweds receive parting words of blessing from their parents before and after the registry office, they must kneel down.

Sometimes it happens that one of the newlyweds may not have a mother or father. In this case, the godparents must bless.

The ceremony of blessing the newlyweds is very difficult, but interesting. Some couples skip it, but in vain. Parents are the most important people in anyone's life. They gave life, raised and were always there - in sorrow and in joy. There is nothing stronger than their sincere blessing. It is believed that young families who decided to keep the traditions and received these holy parting words lived in a happy marriage.

In the old days, it was not customary to play a wedding without parental blessing. This custom carries the wisdom of the older generation and the respect of children for their parents. Without the consent of the parents, they did not get married in the church, otherwise the children who decided to marry without the approval of their ancestors, all their lives had a heavy burden of renunciation of the family. For such couples, family life did not work out, and often completely collapsed.

If we decipher the blessing, we will literally get “praise of the future”. Therefore, this ceremony is considered not only the approval of the choice of your child, but also a promise to a happy future.

Now young people choose their own mate and do not ask their parents for permission to marry. From the blessing ceremony, only a part remained, where the groom's parents admonish young people for a bright and long family life. No one remains indifferent at such a moment, parents place their hopes on their children, and the newlyweds receive support and approval from the older generation.

Orthodox blessing

If you want to go through the rite of Orthodox blessing according to all the canons, then find out if all the participants in the rite are baptized. Otherwise, you will have to be baptized before the wedding. If there are no obstacles to blessing, everyone agrees to conduct the ceremony, then two icons are bought: the icon of the Kazan Mother of God and the icon of Christ the Savior (Nikolai Ugodnik).

The first blessing comes from the girl's parents at her home. Parents with best wishes and parting words baptize their daughter three times with the icon of the Mother of God.
The bride's parents then bless the young couple. When the groom arrives for his betrothed on the wedding day, the bridesmaids offer him other candidates for marriage, after the refusal they ask him for a ransom for a beautiful bride. After a noisy and cheerful ransom, the second blessing of the young is held. This happens before the departure of the bride and groom for registration (wedding). For the ceremony, it is necessary to prepare an embroidered towel. Young people kneel on it in front of their parents, who hold icons in front of them. The father and mother of the bride say solemn parting words and baptize the young with icons three times. When leaving the bride's house, the future spouses take the first step into a new life, where they are met by guests and showered with grain, sweets and coins.

The groom's parents are the last to bless the spouses after marriage. Children come to the parental home after the registry office or perform the ceremony at the entrance to the banquet hall. A “carpet of well-being” is laid under the feet of the young. The groom's mother holds a loaf with a salt shaker in her hands. The father meets the young with an icon at the doorstep, he says words of blessing and wishes for a strong marriage, a happy life. The young spouses kiss the icon, eat bread and salt, and the blessed enter the house.

Modern rite of blessing

If there are any difficulties for making a blessing, then it can be abolished. This is what many do in our time, especially if a multinational marriage is entered into or one of the parents does not accept baptism for religious reasons. In this case, icons are not required. The blessing comes down to a conversation between children and their parents, in which the elders admonish the younger generation, instruct them on a successful marriage and wish them happiness and prosperity.
Of course, this ceremony loses its religious component, but warm and touching words are also important for a young family. They will go deep into the heart of young people and stay there forever.

What is customary to say to parents at the wedding of children

Each parent decides for himself how to bless his child. Who, if not mom and dad, know him best. It is important that the words come from the heart. It is better to learn solemn words in advance, so that at the moment of excitement you will not forget anything. There are standard words of blessing that parents have been using for many years. They have everything that parents have to say, but there is some formalism. You can write your speech, it is better if it is in prose.

wedding after blessings

After receiving blessings from both sides, the newlyweds with the guests go to the hall for the celebration. Icons with towels are placed on the table at which the newlyweds are sitting, and after the wedding is over, they are carefully wrapped and transferred to the house of a young family. Now they will protect the family hearth and become a family heirloom.

At the end of the wedding celebration, the blessing ceremony for all who are present at the wedding will be very symbolic and beautiful. Matchmakers go around all the guests and pass the flame from their candles to them, lighting many other smaller ones. This very beautiful action means the continuity of generations. Everyone receives a piece of parental warmth and love along with a small spark. And how the flame will behave: it will go out from a draft or flare up into a big fire, it depends only on us.

A wedding is the most memorable event in everyone's life. How you want to get married once in your life and live with your loved one until old age. Previously, marriages were strong because people honored God's commandments. My great-grandmother lived a long and happy family life with my great-grandfather, because their parents blessed them at the wedding.

Nowadays, Orthodox traditions are being revived, but not everyone knows how to properly organize a wedding according to church traditions. I will tell you what the blessing of the young is, what icon you need to bless and how to do it.

In modern times, young people themselves choose their life partners, taking responsibility for the choice on their own shoulders. Previously, a married couple was selected more carefully, and for this there was an institution of matchmakers and matchmakers. It was a very beautiful folk tradition, and there were no divorces among the spouses. Unfortunately, those times have already become history, but the tradition of parental blessing lives on to this day.

Bless the young in two ways:

• in the Orthodox tradition;
• in a modern way.

The modern way of blessing is carried out purely formally as a wedding ceremony. Parents give a parting speech to young people in their own words or read a prepared verse. This tradition was adopted in Soviet times, it has been preserved to this day in atheistic families. We will not consider it, since the organization of a secular wedding can be entrusted to specialists in conducting wedding ceremonies.

The blessing of the newlyweds at the wedding in Orthodox traditions has deep roots. This rite crystallized over the centuries, however, the central place was given to icons. Family icons were passed down from generation to generation and served as a powerful amulet for the family. Nowadays, parents can get confused in the ceremony, so it is advisable to clarify incomprehensible points in advance with the priest.

Icons for the bride and groom

What icon is used to bless the young? Traditionally, the blessing is carried out with two icons:

1. the icon of Christ the Savior - for the groom;
2. Icon of the Mother of God - for the bride.

It is customary to bless brides with the icon of Our Lady of Kazan, as she has long been revered as the intercessor of the entire Russian people. The history of the icon dates back to ancient times; it has many miraculous salvations to its credit. The sacrament of the wedding is also carried out with this icon. The priest meets the young in the church with the image and asks for the intercession of the Mother of God:

• about the approval of a strong family;
• about the birth of children;
• about the health of all households;
• about well-being in the family;
• about peace and understanding.

The Kazan Mother of God is the guardian of the hearth, prayers are offered to her for the birth and upbringing of children. With this icon, the mother blesses her daughter.

What icon do the bride's parents bless the young with, besides Our Lady of Kazan? You can bless with any other icon of the Virgin, if there is such a desire. The choice of the image of the Virgin may be due to personal reasons (helped in healing or another problem). It can also be a family icon of the Mother of God, an intercessor and patroness.

The Almighty Savior is an important icon at a wedding. It is to her that prayers are made for well-being in the house, they turn in joy and in sorrow. This icon should bless the groom. A distinctive feature of the icon is the open Bible, which he holds in his right hand. The words are written there: "I give you a new commandment, that you love one another."

However, in practice, the blessing can also be carried out with the icon of the patron saint, the nominal icon of a man. Some choose the image of Nicholas the Wonderworker, as he is one of the most revered saints in Russia.

If you still have family icons from the wedding of great-grandmothers and grandmothers, then it makes sense to perform a blessing ceremony with them.

In the church you can buy a wedding fold - icons of the Virgin and Christ. If the fold was not bought in the church, it must be consecrated before the wedding.

Blessing

How to bless the young correctly? First of all, both newlyweds must be baptized. If one of them did not accept the rite of baptism, it must be carried out before the wedding. The same applies to parents, since it is forbidden to bless young unbaptized parents with icons. This is the greatest sin.

According to Orthodox traditions, before leaving the house for the wedding, the young should kneel in front of the bride's parents and ask for blessings. Parents baptize their children three times, reciting a special prayer. After that, the young people kiss the icon.

Important! You can’t touch the icons with your fingers, they are kept in towels. You can embroider towels yourself, or you can buy ready-made ones.

The bride's parents bless the newlyweds before the wedding, and the groom's parents - after the Church Sacrament. The bride's parents let the daughter kiss the icon, and then the groom. The groom's parents let the icon be kissed first by their son, and then by their daughter-in-law.

After the wedding, the icons first stand on the wedding table, and then they are hung in the red corner of the house. If the newlyweds were baptized in infancy and do not adhere to the Orthodox canons in their lives, the icons are wrapped in towels and stored in a closet.

To avoid misunderstandings during the wedding ceremony, you need to know some of the nuances:

• Get a few embroidered towels in advance - for each icon, for all the loaves, for the knees of the newlyweds.
• Before the young people kiss the icon, they must be baptized with it three times. The sign of the cross is made from left to right to make a true Orthodox cross.
• On the eve of the wedding, consult with the priest how to properly hold the icons. It also does not hurt to find out other nuances of the ceremony.

Remember that parental blessing is the central action in the wedding ceremony. This is not just a blessing, it is the transfer of family traditions to young spouses. Without the blessing of happiness in family life, there may not be.

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Blessing is considered an integral part of marriage. Thus, parents give their consent to marriage and wish their children a happy and long life together. Since ancient times, it has been believed that if the bride or groom did not receive a blessing from their parents, then the marriage will be unhappy and the family may break up.

How to bless the newlyweds with an icon?

According to existing traditions, the parents bless the daughter twice: during the matchmaking and before leaving for the registry office. The groom's parents bless the newlyweds after marriage.

For the ceremony, it is important to know what icons the bride and groom are blessed with, since the images of saints are an obligatory attribute, without which the process turns simply into an expression of wishes and kind words. Basically two images are used:

1. The icon of the Kazan Mother of God is the most revered image of the Mother of God. It is this icon that is most often used in the ceremony of blessing the daughter. She is considered the protector and patroness of all life on earth. There is a huge amount of evidence about how the Kazan Mother of God helped people in solving their troubles. Before marriage, the icon is asked to protect the new family from various problems and the evil eye, as well as to give healthy children.
2. The icon of the Almighty Savior is the most common image of Christ. The blessing of the groom's parents most often takes place with this icon. On it, Jesus is depicted with the Gospel in his hands, which indicates the righteous path, and with the other hand he blesses the people who turned to him with. Before the image, they ask for family happiness and prosperity. It is this icon that needs to be brought into the house of the newlyweds first.

In the ceremony, you can use both icons, and only one of them. As an option, you can purchase a wedding couple or a fold, where two icons are connected to each other.

It is now known which icon the young people are blessed with, it remains to figure out how the ceremony itself goes. In advance, parents should prepare not only the image of the saint, but also the towel on which it will need to be kept. In the room where the blessing takes place, there should be only close people. The mother of the bride picks up an embroidered towel, and the father gives her an icon, which he must also take with a towel and in no case with his bare hands. To bless the young with an icon, it is best to use the image that is in the house, but if there is none, then you need to purchase it in a church shop, where all the icons are consecrated. The mother should hold the icon facing the young.

Now you need to take a closer look at the topic of how to bless the newlyweds with an icon and what you need to say at the same time. There is no specific text that parents should memorize like a prayer, since instructions should come from a pure heart. Please note that the speech should not be too long. The text is a kind of guide to the future, in which parents wish the young, prosperity, peace, harmony, etc. The speech should include not only wishes, but also instructions. During the pronunciation of the words, the mother and father must cross the young people three times with the icon, and then let them kiss the image. After the completion of the ceremony, the icon and towel are handed over to the young, who must keep it as a relic, and it, in turn, will play the role of a talisman.