The rules of etiquette for children is one of the important topics that parents should raise in their family in a timely manner. A person of any age living in a society must reckon with the norms of behavior adopted by this society and follow them. The place of the child in society depends on how conscientiously parents raise their child.

What is etiquette?

Etiquette is a set of norms and rules that regulate the behavior of people in society or a particular social group. Speaking of etiquette for children, we mean the rules of good behavior, first of all, in relation to adults, because it is they who can evaluate behavior as “good” or “bad” due to their experience.

Etiquette is divided into different types - there are both generally accepted rules and special etiquette for individual cases (for example, official, religious, mourning). Children should be taught etiquette gradually, and for preschool age, those good manners rules that kids can apply in everyday situations are enough.

When to instill good manners?

You can teach children the rules of behavior from a young age, although awareness will come much later - after 5 years. Toddlers need to be introduced to the rules of behavior at the table from 2 years old. The child can already eat on his own, which means it's time to start explaining how you can and how you can't behave while eating.

Preschoolers are taught etiquette by parents at home and teachers in kindergarten. The kid is in the company of adults and children, every day around him there are situations that require courtesy, respect for elders, the ability to interact with peers.

When a child grows up and goes to school, his level of freedom will increase, there will be less control from adults. All the omissions of parents in education will be visible at a glance, and it is not easy to correct the behavior of schoolchildren. That is why the rules of etiquette and ethics (the foundations of morality and morality) should be laid down from an early age.

What should a preschooler know?

The best example for the child are family members, especially parents. By imitating them, the baby learns good and bad, so parents should control their behavior in front of the child. You should not forcibly teach a child politeness if, due to his age, he still cannot understand why he needs to greet strangers. Or with those about whom his parents do not speak very well. In addition, the imposition of rules can lead to a backlash - a protest.

Closer to 5 years, just when adult imitation is in full swing, it's time to start paying your child's attention to how you communicate with other people, especially outside the family. Here are the rules that a preschooler needs to know so as not to get into an awkward situation and not make parents blush.

Speech etiquette

It is necessary to follow the rules of speech etiquette not only with members of your family, but in general with all children and adults, not necessarily only with acquaintances. Adults should set an example for children and also follow the rules of communication:

• greet relatives in the morning, wish good night before going to bed;
• greet friends on the street and at a party, and then say goodbye to them;
• greet neighbors, even if you don't know each other personally;
• use the words "thank you", "please", "please", "sorry";
• address strangers with "you";
• do not insult, tease other children, do not snitch, do not provoke;
• apologize if you did a dirty trick;
• say "allow me to interrupt you" if you need to address one of the speakers.

Table etiquette

To accustom the baby to the rules of behavior at the table should be from an early age, and as they grow older, the requirements for the child will grow. The way a child behaves at the table creates the main idea of ​​his upbringing, cleanliness and respect for such a family ritual as eating.

At the meal it is necessary to observe table etiquette:

• you need to eat only in the place designated for this (kitchen or dining room);
• during a family meal, use cutlery, this also applies to young children (stop smearing food with your fingers on a plate);
• you need to eat from your own plate, do not comment on the contents of someone else's;
• do not pounce on food if not all family members have gathered;
• do not chat with a full mouth, remember the rule "when I eat, I am deaf and dumb";
• chew with a closed mouth;
• do not play with food, do not indulge in a drink (do not spill tea, water, do not drink juice loudly through a straw);
• it is indecent to express your negative opinion about food (“fu, well, disgusting”, “I won’t eat it”);
• it is indecent to put your elbows on the table, to push;
• it’s ugly to stretch across the entire table, you need to ask the person sitting next to you to pass something;
• you can not pick your mouth at the table;
• you need to use a napkin or towel, be able to ask for a clean napkin;
• take from the plate that piece of bread (piece of cake, sandwich, fruit) that is closer, and not choose the one that is larger or more beautiful;
• it is even more indecent to take a piece from a common plate, hold it and put it back;
• before leaving the table, you need to wait until all family members finish the meal, or ask adults for permission to leave;
• you can’t take a plate of food and go to the TV or to another room.

Guest etiquette

When visiting, you need to behave calmly, show respect for the owners of the house and follow the rules:

• do not come empty-handed (bring some kind of treat, even symbolic);
• do not ask for tea without an invitation;
• always greet the owners of the house;
• you can’t walk around the rooms without permission and touch other people’s things on the shelves, inside the cabinets;
• it is strictly forbidden to jump on beds, sofas, armchairs, even if the master's child does it;
• do not throw tantrums, do not demand something from the owners of the apartment;
• keep clean, throw away garbage (candy wrappers, a pack of juice), collect toys after yourself;
• calmly pack up and leave when the time comes, do not demand to play more;
• be sure to say "thank you" for the hospitality and treats, say goodbye to the owners of the house.

family etiquette

The rules of conduct in each family are set individually, but there are common ones for all - respect and mutual understanding.

When communicating with family members, you must adhere to the following rules:

• older relatives should be treated with respect, not be rude, not insolent, not undermine the authority of the head of the family;
• swearing, yelling at family members is not allowed;
• if you need to get into the room with your parents (or other relatives), you should definitely knock on the door;
• snitching or “reporting” to a brother or sister is at least ugly;
• it is important to respect the work of family members, whether it is cooking, cleaning the house or playing together.

Rules of conduct on the street

If at home only family members can judge the upbringing of a child, then on the street all the flaws in upbringing are striking. So that you do not have to blush awkwardly and embarrassedly take the baby away, teach him the following rules:

• there is a bin for garbage;
• it is forbidden to walk on lawns, pick flowers from flower beds;
• it is indecent to point a finger at people and discuss their appearance aloud;
• you can’t cross the road when and where you like, if cars drive along it;
• you can not obsessively tell any personal information to strangers;
• it is forbidden to leave the place where the parent left the child to wait for him, or where they agreed to meet;
• you can’t run far ahead of your parents on a walk or hide in busy places;
• moving along the sidewalk, you need to go on the right side (an analogy with traffic lanes for cars);
• do not stop in the middle of the sidewalk to tie a shoelace or chat with a friend - you need to step aside.

Behavior in transport

Sooner or later, you and your child will have to go somewhere by public transport, so instruct the little passenger in advance on how to behave on the bus, train, train, plane:

• on the bus, give way to the elderly (if the child is still small, then explain that now he needs to sit for his own safety, and another person will give way to the grandmother);
• offer a seat to pregnant women (when the child already knows such a concept);
• on a long-distance train, you can’t run around the car, knock on other people’s compartments;
• do not shout, do not knock on the wall of the train compartment;
• on the plane, you can’t get up from your seat if it’s temporarily prohibited, shout loudly, push the seat in front with your feet;
• in any form of transport, it is indecent to get your feet dirty in front of a seated person or to push the back of a chair with dirty shoes;
• it is forbidden to shout, laugh out loud, sing songs.

Rules of conduct in a theatre, circus or other cultural event

Parents have the opportunity to introduce their children to cultural life from an early age - theaters, museums and other institutions are now available almost from birth. Therefore, before visiting such places, you need to explain to the child how to behave:

• do not be late for the performance, but arrive with a margin of time to hand over outerwear, visit the restroom, if necessary;
• come to the hall before the program starts to take your seat and not disturb your neighbors;
• if you are still late, you need to move to your place in a row with your face, while apologizing for the inconvenience caused;
• do not crunch food, do not make noise with a drink during a performance or movie show;
• do not talk during the session, do not answer phone calls, put the device on silent mode.

General rules of conduct

There are things that unacceptable anywhere, in any team:

• scratching, picking teeth, ears, nose in public;
• climb ahead of others when passing through a door, for example, in a store;
• screaming, running, slamming doors;
• be rude, unfriendly to answer questions;
• cough without covering your mouth and burp without apologizing;
• shouting in public transport;
• run and step on your feet;
• shuffle your feet while walking;
• chew gum without covering your mouth, slurp loudly in public.

Rules of conduct for preschoolers in pictures

You can teach your child etiquette both by example and by visual aids. You can explain how to behave in society, and show. For this, the book "Etiquette for Kids" in pictures under the authorship of E. V. Sokolova and N. N. Yankovskaya is suitable.

Showing the baby a picture, you can ask leading questions: “What do you think, what is shown here? How should you behave?" Let the child try to formulate the rules of behavior himself.

Learning by playing

You can also teach your child the rules of good manners in the game. Give courtesy lessons at home when you are working with him or just playing in the nursery. You can play up situations with the help of dolls and your favorite toys - compose a fairy tale about someone ill-mannered, play a mini-sketch, come up with etiquette games (“tea drinking at the dolls”, “the bear went to visit”, etc.), and after - discuss and ask around: “Who did the right thing? And why? Who will mother praise? For kids, you can play a whole theatrical performance.

Read books on this subject and discuss which of the characters behaves correctly and which is impolite to others. There are many books on the topic of children's etiquette, here are some of them:

1. "Etiquette for children of different years", A. Usachev;
2. "Rules of Conduct", E. Beaumont;
3. "Polite words", O. Korneeva;
4. Sociable Tales, T. Shorygina;
5. "ABC of politeness", L. Vasilyeva-Gangnus;
6. "School of courtesy for little owners", N. Ivanova, G. Shalaeva;
7. “Rules of conduct for educated children”, G. Shalaeva, O. Zhuravleva, O. Sazonova;
8. “The most important rules of conduct for educated children”, Harvest publishing house;
9. "Etiquette for fidgets", Clever publishing house;
10. How to behave at the table. Etiquette for everyone in stories, poems, pictures, ed. R. Dankova.

In preschool educational institutions, children are taught politeness according to specially designed programs. Teachers organize classes and teach children the rules of good manners, but this does not mean that parents should leave this topic and rely only on educators.

Note to parents

It is difficult to name the exact age when you need to start teaching a child good manners. It is necessary to instill in a child the norms of behavior with members of the family and society from birth, even when the child is not aware of the whole point. He understands intonations, the mood of relatives and sees a picture of what is happening.

The table below clearly illustrates exemplary age limits when you can acquaint the baby with the rules of behavior.

Table "When and how to teach a child etiquette"

Instead of a conclusion

Children are independent individuals, but at the same time they are a continuation of us adults, our reflection. Looking at how a child behaves with people around him, one can draw far from superficial conclusions about the norms of decency adopted in his family. No wonder they say that you need to educate not children, but yourself, because children take an example from those they see every day, whom they love and whom they want to imitate.

Set good examples, and then the behavior of your children will not disappoint you. Even from a distance, you will be sure that you will not have to blush, apologize and have unpleasant conversations with the child in the hope of correcting what you missed.

Since we live in a civilized world, we cannot do without the application of etiquette rules. Rules of behavior , which are required to be observed in various etiquette situations, are applicable not only to adults, but also to children. The foundation of a person's personality is laid at preschool age, which is why it is so important to start teaching children etiquette from infancy. At the same time, it is important that etiquette and good manners are observed in the family. After all, it is thanks to the family that a young citizen receives the basics of etiquette. Of great importance for a preschool child are also a kindergarten, a playground, a clinic, public transport, that is, those places that he regularly visits in the first years of his life. The kid should be taught not only good manners, but also the rules of speech etiquette. This is not an easy job, but the joint efforts of adults (parents, grandparents, educators, club leaders, etc.) will achieve noticeable results.

We take the skills acquired in childhood with us into adulthood, the success of which is largely determined by the culture of education. A person who is familiar with the concepts of politeness, a culture of communication, and norms of decency will not experience difficulties in maintaining a conversation and will certainly show himself from the best side, no matter what situation he is in.

There are a lot of varieties of children's etiquette (family, passenger, weekend, guest, dining, etc.). But it plays the most important role among them. Independent mastery of the speech norm for a child is impossible. In this regard, the task associated with teaching the child the culture of speech lies entirely on the parental shoulders. A secondary role in this matter is assigned to educators and people with whom the child has to intersect in the course of his life.

Do not think that young children are not ready to perceive information related to etiquette. Some rules of behavior and communication with people are obligatory for observance even by kids. So, from early childhood it is necessary to teach children that:

It is necessary to instill in a child the rules of behavior in the first year of his life. A kid who does not yet know how to talk, on an intuitive level, already understands what adults want to say to him - thanks to intonation, facial expressions, gestures. It’s good when parents, before a meal, wish the crumbs a good appetite, thank you for the toy extended in response, greet him after he wakes up, etc.

From the age of two and up to 4 years, the child begins to actively explore the world around him. It is during this period of time that it is recommended to throw all your efforts into familiarizing him with the rules of etiquette. Information is best learned through play. You can stage a situation related to a telephone conversation, involve dolls, arrange a dinner party, appointing a child as a hospitable host.

This age will be easier to master thanks to fairy tales and poems, closely related to the culture of speech, politeness. The task of adults is to explain incomprehensible words and phrases, and also to try to achieve the most vivid and correct perception of a work of art by a crumb (through intonation, voice timbre and other artistic techniques).

It is also useful to watch instructive cartoons. In any cartoon picture there are both negative and positive characters. It is important to ask how well the kid understood the meaning of the TV story, which characters acted badly, and which of them turned out to be the kindest and fairest.

Such "exercises" help children to better evaluate the characters of books and cartoons, to understand the main idea that the author tried to convey to the audience. In addition, children develop a desire to imitate the main characters, to adopt their moral deeds, rules of behavior and manner of communication.

5-7 years is much easier to master. Training is recommended to be carried out in the form of a conversation, which should be:

• interesting for children;
• short;
• bright and memorable;
• bilateral (with the active participation of the listeners themselves).

It is very important at this stage of growing up a preschool child to increase the study load, which will subsequently allow the child to form speech etiquette. The bottom line is memorizing longer poems, retelling book stories or cartoons, participating in role-playing games, didactic games with dolls, learning to read and the rules for pronouncing sounds / words, etc. Adults need to devote as much time as possible to children who enthusiastic about learning new things. Their future depends on how responsibly adults will approach the issue of teaching their children etiquette. It is not for nothing that children are compared to empty vessels: after all, what they are filled with is what they will be!

How to explain to a child what etiquette is? First of all, this is a set of magical rules that will help you learn how to behave beautifully. Having learned these rules and practicing them daily, the child will be able to easily and simply build communication with relatives, friends and even strangers. The kid will master the rules of good manners and will know how to talk on the phone, behave beautifully at the table, in the theater, at a party. You can teach your child the subtleties of graceful manners by reading our article.

Good manners rules

Good Behavior Rules- these are the rules, knowing which the child will not get into an uncomfortable situation, will not look impolite or ill-mannered. Without these rules you can not do in any kind of activity. Teaching a child etiquette should begin as early as possible and mainly by setting a positive personal example.

“If parents follow the rules of courtesy and etiquette, then the child will not behave in any way.”

Parents do not need to start abstruse conversations and boring moralizing about the rules of etiquette. Psychologists and experienced teachers say that such forms of education only turn children away from observing the norms of etiquette and contribute to the development of an inferiority complex.

It is best to start acquaintance of the smallest with the rules of etiquette using a play form. For example, with the help of dolls or toys beloved by the baby, you can play the situation of a visit to a party or a theater, a telephone conversation, a dinner party. Suppose a child, in the role of a hospitable host, receives guests or, together with his toy friends, goes to a performance in a puppet theater. They help to understand the rules of etiquette well, in which, using the example of characters understandable to the child, the rules and accuracy are explained.

“The basic rule of good manners is that the child understands how important it is to treat others with respect. This law is the basis of all other rules of decency, because the rules of etiquette are nothing more than a good habit to respect people in different situations.

Here are the most simple and mandatory rules of good behavior.

Explain to the child that ugly:

• scratching, combing your hair, picking your teeth and under your nails while in public
• do not greet family members in the morning and evening
• stomp loudly, shout, slam doors
• to get ahead of others when passing forward without apologizing
• sluggishly and unfriendly to answer "yes" and "no"
• sneeze, cough and burp without covering your mouth
• behave in society too noisy and defiant
• enter without knocking on a closed door without waiting for permission to enter
• interrupt a conversation between people without reason and without permission
• to speak very loudly, to talk incessantly
• drag one's feet while walking
• chewing gum in public.

My phone rang

When the baby grows up a little, he can already make and answer phone calls himself.

Teach him how to talk on the phone:

1. Tell your child that phone conversations should be short and polite.
2. It is considered indecent to call before 08:00 and after 21:00.
3. Having dialed the number, the conversation begins with a greeting.
4. It will not be superfluous to ask if this call distracts a person.
5. If you receive a call in which you are asked to invite one of the family members to the phone, you do not need to ask unceremonious questions like “Why do you need him?”. The person will introduce himself and say why he is calling, if he decides that it is necessary.
6. If they call mom (dad, grandmother), and she is not at home, it is appropriate to ask who called and what to convey.
7. Don't forget to say hello.
8. If the child made a call and heard an unfamiliar voice in the receiver, then you need to introduce yourself and ask to call the one you need.
9. If the child dialed the wrong number, you need to apologize and hang up. If you made a mistake by calling your home, you don’t need to get angry, but politely explain: “You made a mistake.”
10. If a stranger called, then you should not lay out details about the life of the family, it is better to call one of the adults. If - no need to notify anyone by phone.

How to behave at the table

From the time when the baby begins to eat with adults, he must be taught the rules of behavior at the table.

"Advice. It is not necessary to teach too complicated rules of behavior at the table from an early age: why do you need a certain fork or some kind of glass. The child will learn all this later, if necessary. The basic rules of decency will suffice."

The basic rules for the behavior of a child at the table are that it is impossible:

• eat, champ, smack and chew with an open mouth
• do not use a napkin while eating, licking your fingers
• stuff your mouth hard
• sit down at the table if the child is not washed, not combed, untidy dressed
• put your elbows on the table
• take food with hands (poking around)
• spit out food
• recline and swing in a chair
• sit at the table, lounging.

Necessary:

• wash your hands before eating
• start eating together
• eat silently
• use napkins
• thank you at the end of the meal for a delicious meal.

Parents must teach their children these simple rules.

"Advice. Don't let the rules be broken. The rules of etiquette that a child does not want to follow from childhood will be quite difficult to instill at an older age. Remind the rules more often.

A video in which funny characters talk about the rules of behavior at the table will help parents convey them to their child in an accessible way.

In addition to these rules, children need to know and follow the rules of behavior at a party and in public places.

Let's go visit

Even the most modest, polite and well-mannered children should know exactly how to behave at a party.

Tell your child how to behave decently:

1. Is it worth it to visit without an invitation? No. Uninvited guests are not welcome. Unexpected visits always cause anxiety. It would be better if you warn about the arrival in advance.
2. It is not customary to visit with "empty hands". It is better to take a small gift with you - a “sign of attention”. The owners will be pleased.
3. When you meet, you should be happy to say hello.
4. When visiting, it is better to behave quietly, calmly, modestly. It's not worth running. It's better to play pranks at home.
5. It is inappropriate to make comments to the owners of the house, critically assess the situation, pointing out shortcomings.
6. You can't touch anything without permission. Interior items located on the shelves can be fragile or very valuable for the owners.
7. It is indecent to be away for a long time: it tires the hosts.
8. It's not good to ask for a visit.
9. Before leaving, you must thank the hosts for the warm welcome.
10. Don't forget to say goodbye.

Following such simple rules, your child will never be a source of discontent, he will make good friends who will gladly invite him to visit.

We visit the theater

Starting to take the child to the theater or to concerts, it is better to immediately begin to explain to him the rules of behavior in such places.

Tell your child how to look and how to behave:

1. People go to cultural places smartly dressed. Jeans, sneakers and a tracksuit are clothes for walking and playing. When going to, it is better for boys to wear trousers and a shirt, and for girls - an elegant dress. When entering the theater, you need to remove your hat.
2. It is not customary to be late for the theater. It is better to come in advance to take off your outerwear and put it in the wardrobe, put your appearance in order, and take the seat indicated on the ticket. According to the rules of theaters, after the third call, they are not allowed into the auditorium.
3. If the seat is in the middle of the row, it is better to take it in advance so as not to cause inconvenience to those sitting around. If it still happened, you need to go to your place facing people, not forgetting to apologize for the anxiety.
4. It is not customary to talk during a performance or performance. It is better to watch calmly, and share your impressions - during the intermission.
5. Do not eat or drink during the performance. For this, there is an intermission and a buffet.
6. It is ugly during the performance to rustle with pieces of paper from sweets and candy bars and throw them anywhere, drink juice loudly through a straw. You can not stick gum to the seats in the auditorium, spoil them, peel off the upholstery and smear them with your feet. Teach your child to appreciate and respect the work of others.
7. If you have a cold, it is better to stay at home. A cough or runny nose will only distract both the audience and the performers.
8. It is not customary for artists to sing along. After all, people did not come to the concert to listen to the singing of other spectators.
9. You can not stretch your legs into the aisle.
10. No need to make noise.

"Advice. It is better for a child of younger preschool age not to buy tickets for the first row. Seeing the faces of the actors made up close, the baby may be frightened and cry. A visit to the theater will be spoiled, and the kid will not have a desire to go to it again.

Remember that if your child behaves boldly and defiantly in the theater, then you risk becoming the object of disapproval of others. And in order not to blush for the behavior of your child, it is better to explain the rules of behavior in the temple of culture in time.

What to do if the child does not follow the rules of etiquette, acts all the time in his own way, no matter how much you repeat to him? It happens, because all children are different. Parents try to raise a good person from a child, but he does not behave at all the way they want, does not obey. In this case, parents should be patient and insist on their own, trying to find new effective and acceptable forms of raising a child. A solution will definitely be found and you will still be able to instill in the little fidget the most elementary rules of behavior in society.

A child, like a sponge, quickly absorbs everything that it sees. That is why parents should behave attentively, culturally, setting the best example of behavior. It is important not only to explain the rules of etiquette, but also to follow them unquestioningly. Looking at you, the child will adopt the best demeanor and easily acquire good habits. Remember that parents are the main people in the life of the child, whom he seeks to be equal to.

Educational institutions, children's centers and teachers can become our partner, obtain a license to use the material "Etiquette School of Yuliana Shevchenko" and conduct classes on etiquette for kids on their own.

Terms of cooperation

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signing a license agreement on cooperation;

payment of a one-time fee of approximately 50,000 rubles.

Author's program "School of etiquette for kids 3+"

Lesson 1. Testing kids for knowledge of the rules of etiquette

Lesson 2. Good manners.

"Culture of communication"

Lesson 3. Acquaintance
Lesson 4. Greeting
Lesson 5. Farewell

Lesson 6. Polite words

Lesson 7. The game "Polite forfeits"

"Cleanliness and tidiness"

Session 8. Cleanliness and personal hygiene

Lesson 9. Microbes and bacteria

Lesson 10. Master class "Clean teeth"

Lesson 11. Clean hands

Lesson 12. Master class "Soap making"
Lesson 13. Order and appearance

Lesson 14. Workshop "Meet by clothes"
Lesson 15. Reinforcing quiz game

Preschool etiquette for kids on the topic

"Table Etiquette"

Lesson 16. Table setting

Lesson 17. Master class "Festive table decoration"

Lesson 18. Behavior at the table

Lesson 19. What, what and how to eat

Lesson 20. Learning to use cutlery

Lesson 21. Master class "Culinary experiments"
Lesson 22. Event "Tea Party"

Preschool etiquette for kids on the topic

"Good manners"

Lesson 23. Behavior away
Lesson 24. Receiving guests
Session 25: Giving and Receiving Gifts

Lesson 26
Lesson 27. Story game

Preschool etiquette for kids on the topic

"Mom, dad, I am a friendly family"

Lesson 28. Me and my family

Lesson 29

Lesson 30. Little helpers

Lesson 31

Lesson 32: Hospital and Respiratory Etiquette

Lesson 33. Ballroom etiquette

Lesson 34. Final testing kids on knowledge of the rules of etiquette, work with a crossword puzzle.

Lesson 35. Graduation

For course participants "School of etiquette for kids" there is an opportunity to immerse yourself in the atmosphere of aristocracy and consolidate the acquired skills in the modern castle of the Czech Republic Chateau Mcely. You can read more about etiquette offsite events on the page.

Well "School of etiquette for kids" designed for 7 months with a training frequency of 1 time per week / 34 etiquette lessons. The duration of the lesson is approximately 45 minutes.