Many people don’t even think about why they scream bitterly at a wedding, while there are several interesting interpretations of the origin of such a custom. Until now, historians have not come to a consensus which of the existing ideas is true. Perhaps this means that they all have a place to be and played at least a small role in consolidating unusual tradition scream bitterly at the wedding.

The first version of the origin of the custom of shouting “bitterly”, pushing the newlyweds to kiss, is based on ancient Russian games. If the wedding ceremony took place in winter time year, then a great feast was supposed, the fast was just ending, and it was allowed to indulge. Therefore, the parents took out the stored delicacies from the cellars and laid chic tables. And the youth, meanwhile, frolicked.

It was customary to build a large snow hill near the bride's house, and then fill it with water until an ice surface forms. When the betrothed came to pick up his bride, one of the obstacles in his path was this very hill. An elegant bride with her bridesmaids climbed to the very top of the mountain and beckoned the groom. In turn, the future spouse, along with friends, had to conquer this mountain, and it was extremely difficult to do this on the icy surface. When the young man got there, he rightfully received a reward in the form of a juicy kiss from his beloved. The groom's friends also did not go unnoticed, as they could demand a kiss from the one they liked. Then they all rolled down the snowy hill together with fervent cries: “Slide!”.

The next version explains in a different way why they scream bitterly at the wedding. Again, at the time Ancient Russia a woman was considered a full-fledged hostess of the table, her duty was to regale guests and receive them cordially. At the celebration of the wedding, the young hostess showed her gratitude to each guest and showed respect by going around all of them personally with a tray, offering vodka. The guest, in turn, was obliged to drink a container filled to the brim. After that, the guest loudly shouted: “Bitter!”, proving that he really drank vodka, not water. At the same time, each guest could put money on a tray, drink vodka and sweetly kiss the bride as a snack. The one who did not pay was left without a reward and received only a glass of vodka. Many considered this permissiveness wrong, so they felt the young girl for all the soft places, and they could kiss her on the ear, on the neckline, and on the lips. Everything depended on the impudence of the tipsy guest.

Of course, such a tradition could not last long, because not every groom could withstand such a strong test because of jealousy. One day, the young husband could not stand it and gave the guest a good cuff. Gradually, this tradition changed, and shouting: “Bitter!” the groom gave kisses to his father-in-law. And only after that a tradition appeared to oblige the newlyweds to kiss for a long time and passionately to the joyful cries of bitterness.

Well, the third version of the origin of the tradition explains why they scream bitterly at the wedding, as follows. People of the pagan faith believed that evil spirits always roam nearby, the purpose of which is to spoil the worldly happiness of all people. Therefore, they tried, so to speak, to bitter this joyful event. To do this, all the guests from time to time shouted: “Bitter!”, Telling the spirits that at this feast there was tasteless food, bitter drinks and a hard life. According to pagan beliefs, everyone around the house at that moment calmed down and went home. Time passed and the guests of the groom grieved for his departure to new family screams bitterly, and the bride at the same time kissed him, proving that in his future family life he would only be sweet.

In which of the proposed explanations for why they scream bitterly at the wedding, it's up to you to believe. But kissing at the wedding has become a tradition in many countries, which are observed to this day.

A wedding is an ancient ritual that has retained many of its features even after centuries. One of them is the tradition of shouting "Bitter!", forcing the newlyweds to kiss over and over again. Moreover, the replicas of "Bitter" can be heard both at large wedding feasts and at modern chamber festivals. The Village decided to ask the experts where this Russian tradition came from and how its perception has been transformed over time.

Maria Strelova

historian-ethnographer

A Russian wedding is surrounded by hundreds of signs and superstitions, the violation of which, according to a Russian person, will lead to unhappiness in marriage. This is an ancient ritual, divided into several parts that have a certain order. Having reached our days, it has been transformed in relation to the realities of our time, but even now it has a number of traditional features.

The cry “Bitter!” Accompanying the kiss of the newlyweds is one of distinctive features Russian wedding. This element has practically become a cultural phenomenon. The origin of the tradition is explained in different ways: there are both cultural and linguistic references.

Weddings in Russia were usually played at the end of the agricultural season, because at other times of the year there is simply no time to get married. For the wedding gulba, an ice slide was built, on top of which the bride stood. At the cry of the guests "Gorka!" the groom had to climb up to the bride, which was not an easy task. Thus, the groom had to prove his love for the bride and the desire to achieve her at any cost. But this theory of the origin of the cry "Bitter!" can be refuted. The Moldavian wedding tradition has its own “Bitter!”, which sounds like “Omar!” and has nothing to do with the word "Gorka". So, most likely, it is worth looking for other explanations.

Another explanation is related to the Russian mentality and the peculiarities of building a family in Russia. The bride must always obey her husband and mother-in-law in everything. In order for the marriage to be strong, the newlywed was forbidden to visit her parents for six months. The girl was given in marriage by her parents, with little regard for her opinion. Agree, it sounds pretty scary - to go to live in a strange family, in an unfamiliar area where there is not a single soul, you can’t see your relatives, and suddenly an evil mother-in-law gets caught. Plus, in Russia in the 18th-19th centuries, the practice of unequal marriages became widespread. Hence a huge layer of lamentations and sad lyrics dedicated, it would seem, to a joyful event - marriage. The bride dressed in white (in Russia White color was a symbol of both purity and mourning for a long time) and she always sang on the last night before the wedding crying for her freedom, saying goodbye to her home, family and friends. And at the wedding, the bride and her mother complained about the bitter fate by shouting “Bitter!”.

Only a few centuries later, when marriages began to be concluded by mutual desire, when the possibility of divorce arose, the secular power represented by the state took over the function of registering marriages. Then the cry of "Bitter!" finally became an expression of joy.

Gerda

toastmaster, host of festive events

I am often asked about this, so for some time now I have known several explanations. I like one of them more than the others. The word "bride" comes from the word "unknown". That is, it is either a stranger, or one that does not know, does not know. In the past, girls, as a rule, were not asked for consent to marriage, they were often given in marriage to a man completely unknown to them - this was almost a generally accepted tradition. The bride said goodbye to the house, experienced the bitterness of parting with her family and waited for a new unknown life. In turn, the groom also said goodbye to bachelor freedom. Therefore, the guests at the wedding sympathized with the young and urged the newlyweds to soften this mutual bitterness with a sweet kiss.

Some old customs modern man already obscure. So now most people at weddings are more accepting of the other version. According to her, it's all about the taste of vodka, which you need to drink for the health of the bride and groom: vodka is bitter, that's why it's "bitter". The bitterness of this drink should soften the young with a kiss in front of the guests.

There is another common version, popular on some thematic forums: according to the canons, the bride brings a glass of vodka to each of the guests, and the guest in response, grimacing and saying “bitterly”, kisses the bride on the cheek. It is clear that only the closest people kissed before, and the attitude towards such kisses was different. But now few brides will be pleased to follow this custom: you never know who can stick. Therefore, the glass is no longer presented in this way - now they will simply pour it, stand at the common table and drink. Previously, wedding toasts were pronounced in a completely different way, but now this is a thing of the past. They love to just constantly shout “Bitter!”, not once or twice, but also to count. So the guests try to guess how many years the marriage will last, and therefore it is better to kiss as long as possible.

There is a very beautiful version that "Bitter" is actually a transformed "Gorki". Apparently, the process of redemption of the bride is meant. They used to come to woo according to the calendar, and most often this happened not in deep winter, but on Maslenitsa. On certain days of the week, it was customary to go for pancakes to different people- for example, to the sister-in-law, mother-in-law. And on one strictly defined day they went to get married. If the bride was marriageable, then the girls-girlfriends met the groom on a hill specially built in the yard. One of the tests was to pull the girls out of there. It is clear that the guys, when pulled off, tried to kiss them, while the older generation allegedly shouted “Gorka!”.

Why do they shout "Bitter!" at a wedding?

The festive ritual of marriage is called a wedding. Before the celebration itself and painting in the registry office there is a cycle of various ceremonies, for example, the ransom of the bride and competitions for the groom. In addition to original ones, new traditions are emerging. For example, the first dance of the newlyweds and the dance, which is borrowed from other nations, where the bride dances with her father. These rituals appeared relatively recently. There are others besides them.

Interesting ritual

But why do they shout “Bitter!” at the wedding? Usually after this, the young should kiss. And no one knows where this tradition came from. I would like to note that already well drunk guests literally torment the young with this word almost every five minutes throughout the evening. This does not allow the newlyweds to sit and relax. So they have to give each other their kisses at the wedding. Guests at this moment joyfully begin counting the number of sweet lips touching.

Let's find the right answer

And yet why do they shout “Bitterly!” at the wedding? There are many answers. According to one version, the tradition originates from ancient times. Our ancestors had completely different morals, other traditions, they did not have televisions and computers, but they did not sit within four walls. They walked and invented various amusements for themselves. One such fun was called "Gorka". It took place during the wedding. The essence of the game is simple: the bride's family built a hill (not very high) in the yard and filled it with water. After that, the young climbed upstairs with her girlfriends. And the groom and his friends climbed to the dais from the other side (to the cries of “Gorka!”) To kiss the bride and girls. As soon as this was done, everyone moved down the hill.

Another suggestion

Why do they shout "Bitter!" at a wedding? Here is another interpretation. There was such a custom: they took a tray, put glasses of bitter vodka on it and gave it to the bride. She went around all the men in turn and gave everyone a drink from a glass. After that, the young man was obliged to shout "Bitterly!". If he put coins on the tray, he earned the right to kiss the girl on the cheek.

"Bitterly!" at the wedding they shout because of evil spirits. Our ancestors were superstitious people and believed in all sorts of fables. It was believed that evil spirits do not like when we feel good. But on such an event as a wedding, you will not grieve. To deceive the evil creatures, everyone started shouting “Bitter!”, thereby showing that they were far from all right. Devilry, having heard such words, she left and did not bother the owners anymore.

"Warm-up" for witnesses - a reason to shout "Bitter!"

At the end of the wedding celebration, no one is looking at the young couple, and the attention is drawn to the witnesses. Here begins something interesting. Everyone shouts "Bitter!" not newlyweds, but witnesses. But the problem is that these people are seeing each other for the first time. And kissing a person you met a few hours ago, perhaps not very pleasant for you, not very desirable. But the witnesses, as you understand, have the right to refuse such a desire of the guests.

Wedding traditions are interesting and diverse. And in particular, there is a custom to shout “Bitter!” at weddings. Why is this done, and for what reason should the spouses kiss at this moment? There is no single answer to this question, and in order to get closer to the answer, it is necessary to consider ancient traditions. There is a lot of wisdom in them.

Shout "Bitter!" taken after a toast, then the newlyweds must kiss. The tradition came from Ancient Russia, today it is followed not only by Russians, but also by Ukrainians, Belarusians, Moldavians, Bulgarians.

Versions - why you need to shout "Bitter!"

There is no single version explaining this custom to this day. However, there are still several options. So, in the past there was a tradition to say at the wedding "Wine in a glass of weed", these words were pronounced after the young people wished happiness. After they were pronounced, the young people kissed, because it was believed that a sincere kiss cleanses the wine and makes it sweeter. Further, these words were transformed into a cry of “Bitter!”, when vodka often began to appear on the tables instead of wine.

There is also another version, which says that in the past the bride had to go around each of the guests personally, and offer each alcoholic drinks from the tray. The guest had to put money or another gift on the tray in return. Drinking vodka from a tray, the guest said: “Bitter!”, And the bride symbolically kissed him. This tradition can be seen today, it is practiced in the villages.

Interesting fact: there is a third version, according to which the cry "Bitter!" symbolizes the sadness that the girlish or bachelor life ends, and the guests regret it.

"Bitterly!" - so as not to jinx the young

People have been thinking about the fact that it is impossible to share joy for a long time, it has grown into some customs. So, it is not recommended to talk about your successes, show off your wealth. A wedding is also not a reason for boasting, because someone can envy the bride or groom, bring grief to their subsequent life. Someone believes that the cry "Bitter!" derived from these beliefs. This cry was supposed to inform the envious and the evil spirit that not everyone is happy here, and therefore there is no point in envying or harming. If, however, to demonstrate at the ceremony that everyone is happy, this will certainly activate evil spirits and envious people - this is what people thought in the past. From here came the tradition of shouting "Bitter!".

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Cross out past negativity

There is a version that when shouting "Bitter!" manages to throw out all the past negativity that could accumulate both in the past of the bride and groom separately, and as part of their premarital relationship. Also, this cry was supposed to throw out the subsequent negative, which will manifest itself after the wedding. After all, the moment of marriage is an important milestone in life, after which the bride was supposed to move to the groom's house, everyone had to give up some past habits, get used to the new state of affairs. Having thrown out bitterness at the wedding, the young could more easily go through the difficult moment of becoming their new life together This is another explanation for this tradition.

Interesting fact: with a kiss after shouting "Bitterly!" counting up to a hundred. It is believed that the longer the couple lasts in a kiss, the longer people will live together.

The tradition of shouting "Bitter!" at weddings these days

This tradition has existed for more than one century, today it is difficult to say in which era it originated. And today, not all people know why they do it, but the tradition turned out to be so strong that it is rarely abandoned. Someone says that in the past, guests praised the vodka they poured in this way, or vice versa, scolded the wine provided to the table. It will be extremely difficult to understand the details today.

So bright, joyful significant event, like a wedding, always leaves the most pleasant impressions not only for the newlyweds, but also for their parents, friends, loved ones. After the wedding ceremony, the spouses and guests are happy to start the feast. It is so customary in our country that the celebration of a wedding is not complete without a lot of toasts, fun games, traditional .

Often, even at the beginning of the feast, the most interesting thing happens - persistent cries of “Bitter!” begin, they come from different ends of the table, become choral. You can stop this "disgrace" with only one action - the bride and groom are obliged to stand up and show everyone their sweet kiss. The tradition of shouting "Bitter!" at the wedding, interesting, but strange - many shy brides do not like kissing the groom in front of everyone. Many modern couples they just don’t understand why they shout “Bitter!” at the wedding. and believe that newlyweds are obliged to jump up and give each other kisses.

Why at the wedding "Bitter"?

There are several versions explaining what “Bitter!” means. at the wedding. The most plausible is the tradition that has Russian roots, it is associated with folk festivals. They got married in those days in late autumn, the festivities were noisy, with a lot of fun. The groom, as usual, had to certainly prove his dexterity. In the courtyard of the house where the celebration took place, or not far from it, a hill was poured. The future wife with her girlfriends carefully climbed to its top, and her husband had to climb the hill as quickly as possible and kiss his beloved. After that, the groom's friends also climbed the hill to kiss the bridesmaids. The groom was obliged to run up the slippery path to the cries of the guests, they yelled “Gorka!”. So it turned out a play on words "slide-bitterly."

Another theory explains the emergence of such wedding custom the superstition of our ancestors. They were very afraid that insidious evil forces (witches, brownies and other evil spirits) could easily spoil the holiday and even family life newlyweds. In order to deceive the representatives of evil forces, the parents and everyone who was at the wedding shouted “Bitter!”, as if proving that they all live “worse than nowhere.” According to legend, the devils and various evil spirits, unable to withstand such grief, had to get out the best of health, go to those who live more sweetly.

Another legend tells that during the feasts in Kievan Rus, the bride was obliged to go around the tables, holding a large carved tray in her hands. There were glasses of vodka in a row on it. All the guests invited to the wedding put coins and gold there, and then took a glass of vodka, while shouting “Bitter!”. By the way, this custom has survived to our time - in some villages of Russia this is exactly what they do.

Hundreds of years ago, at weddings, they shouted “Bitter!”, as if declaring that the wine in goblets and bowls was not sweet enough. The newlyweds, with their many sweet kisses, were supposed to magically “sweeten” the wine of their dear guests.

This cheerful wedding tradition was adopted by many nations - Moldovans, Belarusians, Bulgarians. The word "Bitter!" in many languages ​​​​of the Slavic group, guests at weddings in many countries of the world continue to shout with pleasure. Of course, some newlyweds still do not understand why they shout “Bitter!” at the wedding, and kiss in public with unwillingness - this is their right. However, the glorious ancient traditions should be respected and preserved, passed on to the next generations. The tradition of shouting the wedding "Bitter!" - just one of such important and valuable.