There is often a situation in which the child loves one of the parents more. The second parent is trying with all his might to win the baby's favor, but his efforts are in vain. What is the reason for this phenomenon?

First, understand that the child most often does not understand how hard it is for the parent who is being ignored. Therefore, do not rush to blame the baby for everything, attributing excessive "coldness" to him. However, it is not worth executing yourself either, because sometimes even all the tried and tested methods are not suitable in order to change the child's attitude.

There is a widespread belief that daughters are most often attracted to fathers and sons to mothers. Although, of course, at the stage of growing up, children often gravitate towards the parent of the same gender. It is impossible to say for sure to whom your child will be more disposed - much depends on his character, characteristics of upbringing and other factors.

As they grow up, the child becomes more independent and begins to choose friends for himself, taking into account his own habits and views. It is not surprising that he finds more common ground with one of the parents, because we are all different.

Analyze why the child loves dad more than mom. Perhaps he was only with his mother for a long time, and saw his father only on holidays? Then the desire to compensate for the lack of attention is more than justified.

Pay attention to how the father behaves with the child. Maybe the reason that the baby seeks to communicate with the dad is that the latter permits him everything? If the child receives toys and treats only from the father, knows that he will never be punished, then, of course, the father becomes a closer person to the child. Talk to your spouse and decide what tactics of behavior you will adhere to with him. Analyze whether it is always necessary to pamper the child as dad does, or occasionally it is necessary to show character, as mom does.

It is worth considering that sometimes it is difficult for children to build relationships with two parents at the same time. That's why, Small child chooses a dad who is physically stronger than mom and can ride on his back, carry on his hands, play "airplanes". This is not surprising, because in the first years of life, the child interacts with others precisely through play, gladly responding to the desire of one of the parents to play with him.

You should not be jealous of a child for dad. You will see that soon the child will be able to learn to build relationships with both parents, if he sees that you are ready for this!

Very often the child loves not the dad more, but the mother, and prefers to spend time with her. Accordingly, the father is worried about this. And sometimes the opposite situation arises: the child loves dad more. The site "Beautiful and Successful" will tell you how to make sure that the baby's love was the same to both parents.

Any change in the child's behavior has its own logical explanation. We will first consider the situation where the child loves mom more than dad. This is quite typical.

The kid spends more time with his mother. He is calm with her, comfortable, he feels protected. And since dad is at work most of the time, the child spends little time with him.

In order for the father to deserve the love of his child, something needs to be changed in my dad's behavior.

The child loves mom more than dad

If a child grows up as a "mama's boy", and he is not at all attracted to his father, then the problem is just in the behavior of the dad... Something needs to be changed in your behavior towards the child, and you will notice how the child reaches out to you.

Dedicate your free time to your child, not the computer

Often the father, after returning from work, immediately sits down at the computer, citing fatigue. The child does not see him at all and does not feel that the parent wants to communicate with him.

A small family member has feeling of unknown... He doesn't know how dad will react to his joke, he doesn't know if dad will agree.

And out of a sense of self-preservation (and it is very developed in children aged 3 years and older), the child himself does not make contact, but is drawn to the mother. In such circumstances, a situation where the child loves dad more than mom cannot arise.

Try at least not all your free time, but devote most of it to your own little son or daughter. Deep down, the child really wants your attention.

Of course, not on the very first day the baby will change his attitude towards his father, but everyday pastime with the child will soon give its results. The child will stop losing his mother, and will calmly play with his dad. And your family relationships with the child will become close and trusting.

Consult your son or daughter, ask their opinion

A child who loves mom more than dad may be interested in personal participation in making any paternal decision. It will be appropriate for the dad to cheat and make the baby himself express a desire to spend time with him.

It is easy to do this: tell your child that you have a very important task, and you do not know how to act in a particular situation.

Children are little dreamers.

They love very much when parents not only listen to their inventions, but also carry out in practice... Seek advice from your children often, and they will feel indispensable. Children will want to spend time with you, as they will feel their "need".

Allocate one of the days off for spending time with children

Only on weekends and holidays we can forget about working days. It is on such days that you need to spend as much time as possible with your family in nature, in the country, in the zoological garden, in a cafe, on attractions.

You can think of a whole lot of places for joint recreation (and the site is a site about this. Only games, recreation and joint hobby can change the child's attitude to the father.

Express love for the child's mother more often.

The child loves mom more than dad, perhaps because the father pays little attention to his wife (baby's mother). For a child, mom always remains the most beloved and dear person in the world. And if dad ignores her requests and signs of attention, then the baby sees the offender in the father.

When quarrels occur in the family, the child takes the side of one of the parents.

An even distribution of children's feelings of love between parents is possible only if baby sees dad's love for mom and vice versa.

Thus, if the dad does not "rest" from the family, is interested in communication, and most importantly, he tries to earn the child's love, the child will love his father and will strive to spend more time with him.

A happy, strong family is the key to the healthy development of the baby!

The child loves dad more: rules of conduct for mom

Surprisingly, there are also families where the child prefers the company of the dad communicating with mom. This situation is considered not entirely normal.

And in order to fix it, moms need to heed the advice of the site site.

So, how should mom behave if the child loves dad more?

Be kinder to the child, do not yell at him

Perhaps the child loves dad more and is drawn to his father, because mom still does not have the patience to calmly accept all his pranks. A child in any case, no matter how well he was brought up, will do various stupid things and be harmful.

There can only be one piece of advice - be patient.

This problematic age ends when the baby turns 5-6 years old.

Collaborate daily

Joint creativity will help to return the former love for mom. The child is interested in the general "handicraft" and forgets all grievances.

Taking advantage of this moment praise your baby more often, encourage his diligence.

Young children love to be praised. Through this activity, the bond between mother and child becomes much stronger.

Don't ignore your baby's requests

The child loves dad more than mom when cannot get feedback from the mother. Children aged one and a half to three years are very attached to their mother and do not want to play without her. They distract her from household chores in various ways so that her mother can play with them.

But repeated ignoring of such requests leads to resentment against himself a loved one and the child from despair goes to the father.

If the mother is busy and the child drags her to play his games, then these two activities should be combined.

For example, you are cooking dinner. Give your child a task in the kitchen. Bring this, throw it away. Thus, the child will be busy and happy to help you.

Spend time with a complete family every weekend (mom, dad, baby)

If the child loves dad more, you need to spend more time with everyone, a full-fledged family. This is how the child learns to love mom and dad equally. He sees the attitude of his parents towards him, the attitude of mom and dad to each other. This kind of idyll helps the baby to feel beloved, needed by both parents.

Only a constant pastime with a full family can teach a child to value family ties and set an example for him for his future family.

Thus, in order for the child to love both mom and dad, both parents need to listen to him, help him in difficult life situations and always be there.

Parents love gives rise to a response from the baby. Do not ignore your child, because someday he will have a family and everything that you laid in him in childhood will certainly affect his attitude towards his own children!

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Time: 23:44 Date: 05/05/03

Girls, mothers, tell me what to do? Our baby loves his dad more than me. It already seems to me that jealousy is waking up in me. And this is to my beloved husband, the father of my child! This is not normal. But nevertheless, I feel so offended when my father comes home in the afternoon and then in the evening, the boy follows him on his heels, he can easily do without me (he is 1.5 years old). Probably, this is due to the fact that all mothers are forced to eat, they change their clothes when tights are off, they give medicine, they put them to bed on the very interesting place etc. And dad came to play. I ate what my mother had prepared, dressed, that my mother washed and stroked and kissed my son on the top of his head: "Dad will come soon, behave yourself!" and went on business. And mom, to the detriment of communication with Rubenko, again cooks, erases, etc. And the baby is with her in the kitchen, not where he wants to be and play. but where mom needs it because of her business. It turned out a bit mumbura, but I think the problem is clear. Will you advise how to behave?

Time: 00:20 Date: 06/05/03

It seems to me that you are exaggerating about "loves more". I would say "bored more", as dad sees less often. And if mom also "disappears" for the whole day, then there will be joy !!!

Time: 06:34 Date: 06/05/03

It seems to me that the child just perceives you as a matter of course, because you are with him all the time. He knows that you will not go anywhere, and dad is leaving. This does not mean that he loves you less. It also seems to me that you just sat at home and tired of the daily chores of household chores. Try leaving your toddler with Daddy and going out on your own on a weekend or evening! business for at least an hour and a half. Well, there in the store or to a friend to drink tea. You will see that your child, after absence, will be happy to welcome you.

Time: 07:53 Date: 06/05/03

I agree with the previous answers. Try to leave dad and the baby alone, and go somewhere else for the whole day. And you will see that the child missed you too, and will be very happy about your return.

Time: 11:19 Date: 06/05/03

And I agree that the child just misses his dad, because sees him less often. Don't worry, you are the most close person in the life of a kid.

Time: 17:40 Date: 06/05/03

Of course, I agree with the previous answers, do not worry. Love your dad, let him love you too, do not hide yours from the baby tender feelings and everything will be great for you.
Leave Dad and Lala for a day or two sometime.

Time: 00:54 Date: 07/05/03

I watch the relationship in my friend's family. The child from time to time adores mom, then adores dad and zero attention to mom. I think babies go through these stages for a better knowledge of the world.
Now they are in the stage of adoration of their mother.
Wait, there will be a holiday on your street too.

Time: 05:17 Date: 07/05/03

I read everything that was answered here, our situation is the same as that of the author of the topic, dad loves more (but it only makes me happy) So about boredom, we gave the child to grandparents for four days, and when he returned, then to Dad rushed and kissed him, and I got a careless kiss Maybe this is due to the fact that we gave him for weaning and he was offended at me for this, but I am more inclined to think that dad really loves more !!!

Time: 10:00 Date: 07/05/03

In my opinion, this is true for everyone.

Time: 22:12 Date: 07/05/03

The children see little of both of us - we both work, so they actually run to both of us. And then they all have a period - mamsic and papsic. This is a normal stage of personality development in your case. Mom is always there, but dad is rare.

Time: 22:22 Date: 07/05/03

And my little one is also playing with dad, laughing. When I pick him up, he looks at dad, his eyes do not take off. But if he cries, then he calms down only with me.

Time: 04:48 Date: 08/05/03

Be glad that your son loves dad. My son is also 1.5 years old. Dad is at work all day, and when he pisses his son does not react to him violently, because he is used to me. It makes me sad ...

Time: 04:51 Date: 08/05/03

Well, what's wrong with that that a child loves his dad? Moreover, he is a future man, dad can instill a lot of masculine qualities in him!

Time: 08:05 Date: 08/05/03

Oh, in my opinion there are mamsiks, and there are paps. Here I have a pronounced mamsik. I would be glad if the child would go to dad and play with him, but nothing ... But my friends have a son for 3 years, and he does everything only with dad, there is practically no attention for mom. And I don't think that in any of these cases the second parent is unloved, no, it's just that the child has chosen for himself with whom he needs to spend all the time now. Most likely, in the future, the relationship will level out.

Time: 13:10 Date: 08/05/03

In our country, up to 1.5 years old, Nikita loved dad more than me, and then there was equality. But anyway, when I come home, I walk in the door. Nikita immediately asks where is dad.

Time: 16:35 Date: 08/05/03

And here he immediately rushes to dad. Although if dad leaves the house, it's normal, I'm used to it. And if mom - roar for half an hour.

Time: 11:59 Date: 09/05/03

He reaches out to a man intuitively, not yet fully realizing that he is a man himself.

Time: 15:44 Date: 11/05/03

so it's good! some of my friends docha's dad is scared. though she is small - only 1.3, and dad is constantly on business trips ...

Time: 11:05 Date: 12/05/03

Mom is weekdays, dad is a holiday!

Time: 19:38 Date: 12/05/03

Be patient a little, soon it will grow up, you will come out of the depression and everything will return to normal.

Time: 22:06 Date: 12/05/03

It was so! Sometimes jealousy appeared. But then it all goes away. The child gets used to the mother, the mother is, as it were, self-evident that she is always there, and the father appears less often. Then the child grows up and everything falls into place. Good luck to you.

Time: 14:35 Date: 13/05/03

Mom is weekdays, and dad is a holiday. Now, if dad begins to scold the child for pranks and punish, then mom will immediately become beloved

Anonymous
Time: 18:21 Date: 13/05/03

I think that's true, it's sad, but you're right. Throughout my childhood, I also loved my father more than my mother, and even now. But only now, when I’m already in my thirties, I understand that he actually didn’t do anything to deserve this love, and my mother did, but did not receive her.

Time: 20:51 Date: 16/05/03

Dont be upset. Now he is more happy with his dad, but if you start to work and are not able to spend the whole day with him, then all his attention will be shared with people.
My daughter is one year old and she is a real mamsik. To be honest, I am very tired, we have neither grandfathers nor grandmothers. I have been getting up to my daughter several times every night for a year now. I spend the night with my dad nivkakuyu, and sometimes during the day does not really want to stay with him.
So be calm and rejoice, not jealous.

Time: 11:26 Date: 18/06/03

Unfortunately, this phenomenon is frequent. The child sees mother often and this is taken for granted. And dad is perceived as a holiday.

Time: 13:32 Date: 18/06/03

Because dad most often only plays with the child, and mom plays, and makes something to do, and scolds. It’s all natural that he perceives dad as a holiday. This does not mean at all that he loves him more. And then it's great that he loves both dad and mom. I think dad would be more offended if the child pushed him away. So don't worry. Everything will be fine! And the baby loves both of you!

Time: 09:56 Date: 19/06/03

Well, Sonya also loves dad more. From me she only wants to sit. But it's so great when a child loves dad! I'm not jealous. Almost

The child loves dad more than mom. Why?

When dad is at home, the principle of “good and bad cops” most often works here: dad, respectively, is a good cop, and mom (that is, I) is a bad one, I always ask you to clean up after yourself or do something. Daddy allows the child a lot - more than I (but, of course, within reason), he can play games with him that I cannot (spin, for example, or throw a couple of times in the air - I don’t have enough strength for this ). Plus, the child rarely sees his father - he works a lot, but he sees his mother all the time - I'm sitting with him at home on maternity leave. Therefore, he misses his dad more and it seems that he loves more. Although I think that he loves us all the same (well, or almost equally).

This often happens up to a certain age in babies, girls are more drawn to dad, boys to mom, even jealousy can be observed, as Freud argued - this is something like first love, first attraction to the opposite sex, but if an adult child loves more father, then the father played a more significant role in his life, not all mothers can be nominated for an Oscar, some cope worse with their maternal responsibilities, so the child is more drawn to the one who understands him and who was more involved in them in his time.

Well, most likely this is because he sees dad less often than mom. And dad always brings him some toys and goodies for him. And in the rare moments when dad plays with a child, he (dad) gives all the best full program, for a week ahead.

Perhaps the daddy constantly pampers the child with all sorts of gifts, trips to interesting places, and even treatment. The more strict mom makes the child do what he does not want (I say, this is not in a bad way, but as a fact). Perhaps the father is more busy at work. , the child misses him, rarely sees and is always very happy when dad is with him.

It is difficult to deceive a child while he is small, it is unlikely that his great craving for one of the parents can be explained by some kind of slyness. It's just that the child feels better with this particular parent. Perhaps dad spent more time with the child, in the modern world this is not so rare. Perhaps, raising the child, the mother overdid it somewhere, and the dad, whom he sees less often does not allow himself this, spoils. Although such a situation cannot be called standard, as a rule, while the child is small, he is more drawn to the mother. In this matter, the age of the child and the family situation are important, from here and you need to start.

The child sees the father less often, but usually plays with him more often. Moreover, the nature of the games is different. The father can throw the child up, spin the merry-go-round, wrestle, ride on himself. Which of course the mother will not do. Because the safety of the child is most important to her. The child is impatient to learn about life in all its manifestations. The father is to develop the child physically. Show your child that sports can be fun.

Well, children most of all reach out to those parents, either to mom or dad, in the event that one of the parents pays as much attention as possible. Well, or spoils, does not shout, does not scold. Well, mostly boys go to dad and girls to mom, since dad brings up the baby as a real man, and mom makes a girl a girl, prepares for future life, a girl.

The child feels a more harmonious person, so he is drawn to him. And sun. And this is natural, and rightly so. This explains the child's attraction to the parent. Thus, he saves his soul as best he can.

I'll tell you on my own. I have both a boy and a girl. The girl reaches for me more (and this is understandable), the boy is less, but also reaches out. My wife blames me for being hard on children. The main thing for me is to put them on legs. I am more loyal to the girl (she is a girl), but strict requirements to the boy (he still has to serve in the Army). Naturally, he doesn't like this. I won't make a WOMAN out of a girl (mom is responsible for this), a MAN needs to be raised from a boy, and not a smear. A man will do it better. This is rather the answer. Who wants to do what they don’t want, But we must!

Dads have more demand for boys than girls.

Do not worry about this, the main thing is to love your children, love your wife (a good example for a girl) and, of course, do not forget about yourself.

In all likelihood, dad is closer to the child in spirit. As a rule, sons are more drawn to dads, although there is a huge emotional connection between fathers and their beloved daughters. Common interests bring people closer together. Moreover, the frequent absence of the head of the family makes communication with him a real treat for the baby.

probably because the daddy makes the child more indulgences. mom demands more that's why she is in 2nd place

.... The dad is more advanced in some important issue for the child ... usually it is a question of a certain safety of the child .... Astral safety ... technogenic safety .... The mother is not a dream or a spirit about this ... the man is more well-read and the imagination is more developed, can assume and realize.

Probably only when the dad pays maximum attention, cherishes, never punishes) For a child, when he is a little one who does not scold, whoever plays with him is his beloved) Only with age does the child understand the full value of the mother's care and love ).

It is necessary to know both you and your husband well in order to give an answer that is at least close to the truth. First, it can only seem to you. Secondly, rejoice for your husband, he means a good father, and do not equate whom the child loves more, especially with actions to counter him, and your reputation in the eyes of the child will grow. Raising a child is a joint affair, even when the parents are divorced. The little man's priority arises spontaneously, proceeding from concern for nm, from the emerging respect. Look behind you. Maybe you are grumpy, scandalous, or just constantly busy. In the World Cup, you are inferior to your husband in purely human qualities. Try to fix it. And remember that the child loves you initially, even if it seems that he loves less than his father. And the manifestations of less attraction than to the father are dictated by some of your mistakes. This is sometimes difficult to admit, but you always have to start with yourself. And in no case should you be offended by the child, do not demand, because the child does not owe you anything. His love is your merit, not his duty.

Everything is very simple. Mom spends more time with the child, and as a result, makes the child do what he does not always want and what he likes, sometimes even punishes. And dad spends more time at work, outside the family, when he comes home it’s like a holiday, brings gifts, then something tasty, plays and pampers the child. Therefore, the child is drawn to dad, but this does not mean at all that he loves mom less. Just imagine what will happen if your child spends the whole day without you, not to mention a longer absence.

In vain do adults try to evaluate the relationship between children and parents in terms of the strength of the child's attachment or preferences. The child himself is not able to understand himself, and most importantly, he is completely far from assessing his relationship with his parents, but the parents arrange not comic competition for the object of his adoration. This is due to the fact that parents are not a family, which is a single organism responsible for raising children. First of all, the children themselves suffer from this.

Have you ever asked yourself the question: “Why do children love their fathers more?” Why, when a husband comes home from work, your child flies to him at breakneck speed, throws himself on his neck and almost cries with joy? Even a very small child smiles at his father more often.

Let's think about this question.

One of the reasons is the mother herself.

The fact is that childbirth for every woman is the most important event In life. And it is very rare if the woman in labor does not overtake postpartum depression. Psychological studies have shown that 30-50% of women have postpartum emotional disorders, some of which are related to postpartum depression of varying severity. To a very mild degree, negative emotions can manifest itself in 80% of women. The mother's depressive state is directly reflected in the nature of her relationship with the child - for example, in impulsive and inappropriate reactions, moreover, their inconstancy and unpredictability negatively affect the mother-child relationship and cause negative behaviors in the child, similar to that of the mother. This problem is often reflected in restless sleep and difficulty feeding the baby.

Also, in this matter, your care for the child plays an important role.

The first is hygiene.

An important component of children's personal hygiene is regular skin, oral and dental care. This will help to avoid many infectious diseases and other health disorders. But does the child really like it when you stick cotton wool in his nose or ears, when you clean the mouth with a soda solution or put a gas tube if the baby is not able to empty himself?

Secondly, it is caring for a child during illness.

I doubt that any of the adults like the taste of paracetamol, but imagine the state of a child when bitter nasty stuff is stuffed into his mouth! At the same time, you wake him up and calm him down!

Another is study.

Even if the child went to Kindergarten or to school preparation classes, he was not required to do his homework every day, he just was not used to it. Involuntary memory or attention - this is when a child, without noticing it, can remember the contents of an entire book - at the age of six or seven they begin to fade away. And arbitrariness - the ability to force oneself to do something by an effort of will - is just being formed.

The child is now not at all sweet. He has a mental load, and it is his mother who makes him deduce "storks" and learn the multiplication table, instead of engaging in an exciting game of hide and seek together or does not let him watch the cartoon ?!

Children simply do not understand that the mother does the procedures and treatment not in order to offend him, but to help the child not acquire diseases and infections or get rid of them, since they have already appeared, and gaining knowledge is the key to his future.

Children perceive the father as a protector and benefactor, who does not torment, like a mother, but pampers, rides on himself, etc. and which will be so easy to miss, because your husband goes to work, and you and your baby are on maternity leave and constantly monitor him.

In general, if you want to change the situation, then share the "torment of the child" for two. Let the father try to potty train the perky with you, go to the hospital and, at least sometimes, do homework with the child. Spend as much time as possible together. And Let's hope that everything will change, and over time the child himself realizes that all this was done only for his good.