April 7, 2016, 15:20

I wanted to write a post about customs and culture, and focus on the "wedding", since now this topic is especially relevant. But I think to tell a little about the republic itself, maybe I'm wrong, but I haven't noticed any posts about it yet, and I think that there are many readers who are not familiar with my little Motherland.

I am from the sunny, steppe Republic of Kalmykia, which is located in the extreme southeast of the European part of Russia. This republic is very interesting and possibly capricious, our summers are hot and dry, winters with little snow with a piercing steppe wind and great cold weather. Our people are kind and simple. Perhaps you will consider me a fierce patriot, but is that bad? I do not hide that I love my republic.

Our nature is harmonious, the steppes are strewn with red tulips in spring, the long Volga River flows, there are small lakes and in the east it is washed by the Caspian Sea, where magically beautiful lotuses bloom. The people in Kalmykia are the simplest, but proud. Endured war and genocide. If you have never been with us, we are looking forward to your visit. I am sure you will like our picturesque and hospitable town, with its simplicity and beauty, our steppe pearl - the city of Elista. Having come to us, you will plunge into an exotic city, with no less exotic people for Russia. In which there are many attractions, Chess town, interesting monuments.

It is worth noting that the Kalmyks are the only people in Europe who traditionally profess Buddhism, and we also have one of the largest Buddhist temples in Europe - called "The Golden Abode of Buddha Shakyamuni". The khurul building is 63 meters high and contains the largest nine-meter statue of Buddha in Russia and Europe.

So let's move on to weddings.

Since ancient times, in Kalmykia, the preparation for the wedding celebration was approached responsibly, it had to look festive and beautiful. Families, clans and khotons became related at the wedding. Everyone tried to show themselves in all their glory, therefore they arranged different tests for each other.

Wedding ceremonies begin two days before the wedding. Relatives come to the bride's house and everyone should add something to the dowry. They prepare the bride amicably: relatives cut off their nails, a curl, and cut off the threads from the dowry. All this must be burned. This means that a girl, getting married, leaves this house, her former life forever. No wonder she will be given a new name in her husband's house, symbolizing the beginning of a new stage in life.

Meanwhile, the wedding train is being equipped at the groom's house. The delegation must be headed by a man (paternal uncle, brother or elder). The number of delegates must be odd. But among them there should not be young unmarried relatives who, according to legend, can “pull off” the happiness of the young on themselves. The wedding delegation must leave early in order to have time to go to the matchmaker's house before lunchtime. And one more important detail: they leave and enter the house only - on the right side (in the sun), in this case, it is considered that the case will be successful.

The arrival of guests at the bride's house is also associated with numerous rituals. First of all, they bring in a gift for women, the so-called "beryachudin hot" ("a gift for young women"). Then they bring in tea, butter, boiled lamb (if they persuaded about a live sheep, they also bring it into the house), sweets. Last but not least, alcohol is brought into the house: vodka, wine. It is believed that if the matchmakers do not fully bring the promised, then the bride's happiness will be incomplete, and besides, the matchmakers' loyalty to the given word is checked.

And only after all the ceremonies, the guests enter the house, but before sitting at the festive table, they must wash their hands, rinse their mouths and pray. The wedding meal begins at the table, which is accompanied by many interesting and fun ceremonies.

Previously, guests who came to fetch the bride had to spend the night in the matchmaker's house. The feast, according to custom, lasts all night. In the midst of the celebration, usually after midnight, the groom's side secretly holds a council on which a clever and quick guy is selected. He is entrusted with an important mission: to touch the bride.

At dawn, when the dawn is just beginning to grow, and the music is still thundering throughout the neighborhood, the guy in the process of dancing must slip into the tent where the bride is sitting and touch her shoulder. But this must be done so inconspicuously that in no case this maneuver will be noticed by the bride's girlfriend, otherwise the courier cannot avoid ridicule and shame. That is why it is important to opt for a smart and agile young man. The messenger touched the bride's shoulder - this is a sign that it's time to get ready for the journey.

The bride is taken out to the groom. During this time, girls and married women are separated. The women take the bride by the hands, and the young girls interfere, showing in every way that they do not want to give up their girlfriend, relative. Before leaving, the mother orders her daughter to venerate the parental Burkhans for the last time (Buddhist altar) and take a farewell sip of milk from her hearth, forever abandoned by her. ...

When leaving the house, one of the matchmakers covers the bride's head with a scarf brought from the groom's house. The meaning of this rite is that, firstly, it is a sign of a woman's new status, because Previously, a woman was not supposed to appear in public with a bare head among Kalmyks. She will have to wear this scarf. You cannot give it to anyone. Secondly, so that she could not find her way back. This path is now closed to her. Under the general noise, din, jokes, laughter, tears and lamentations, the future hostess is taken to the groom. He puts the bride on his horse and takes her away.

And in the house they begin to take out the dowry. This honorable mission is entrusted to the guests who have arrived for the bride. Finally, when everything is loaded, the wedding train departs for home; some of the horsemen, however, remain in order to redeem from the young women that part of the dowry, which they managed to hide under the general noise. The messengers offer gifts: a box of sweets, cookies, and in addition present them with handkerchiefs. As soon as the food and gifts are accepted, the rest of the belongings are given away. In addition, the representatives of the groom should take with them the curtain behind which the bride was sitting during the wedding feast. Women spread the cloth on the ground, and the guys arrange races. The canopy must be lifted off the ground at a gallop. The groom also participates in this competition. According to an unspoken rule, it was he who had to pick up the canopy. On this wedding festivities continue with the groom.

P.S: Thank you all for your attention, I was very glad to immerse you all in a hopefully informative story for you. And I hope you enjoy this post, I will be glad to read the comments and answer questions. Once again I apologize for any mistakes. All love, kindness and prosperity to your home, and have a great weekend!

At the appointed time, the guests gather in the lobby. A car with young people drives up to the front door. The signal to the beginning sounds - Fanfare. Leading exit.

Leading: Mendvt, kundtya uurmud! Good evening, dear guests and guests! Today the Ozayev family cordially invite all of you to the wedding of Konstantin and Yulia, so that, according to the established good tradition, in a warm and friendly circle of people close and dear to them, to celebrate this unforgettable event! Dear guests! We invite everyone to rise and greet the bride and groom with applause!

Then the "Wedding March" by F. Mendelssohn sounds.
The spouses, accompanied by the person in charge, go to the entrance. At the door are the relatives of the young people, guests, a support group. They form a solemn corridor for the young. At the entrance, two people shoot firecrackers, showering confetti on the young, and in front of the young people are met by children carrying baskets or bags of rose petals in their hands and sprinkling them on the floor. Participants in the corridor shower the young people with rice and coins (symbolizes wealth and prosperity). At this time, the presenter begins to read poetry.

Leading(per pass) :

By tradition, we throw grain at our feet,

so that it sprouts with health, happiness.

We throw copper coins under our feet,

so that you never be poor.

We throw petals of the most beautiful roses

so that you know neither grief nor tears!

Leading: Dear friends! Let's rejoice together at the birth of a new family, the Ozayev family, and this happy moment must be captured on video and photos for the family archive!

Applause. The support group and the newlyweds are photographed. After photographing, young people pass and take their places at the festive table.

Leading: Here they are the heroes of the occasion: Constantine and Julia! Even their names mean very poetically. There are many coincidences in their horoscopes: this is warmth, compassion, respect for the people around them and special affection for their loved ones. Constantine is a bright personality with mysterious powers. Self-confident, reliable family stronghold. Julia is characterized by a sharp mind, creativity, a wonderful sense of humor, observation and resourcefulness. Very good, hospitable hostess. So that a bride with such a symbolic name, entering the house, will bring into the new family her special atmosphere of Kindness, Warmth and Reliability of the home front! And the magic Melody of Love will decorate your relationship and consolidate them even stronger! Let's greet our young people once again - Konstantin and Yulia!

Leading: According to the established good tradition, the right to be the first to congratulate a newly created family, to be the first to say a parting word to the young, is given to the oldest and most respected representatives of the family. The floor for congratulations is given to the groom's uncle Ozayev Valery Zergentievich and his wife Nadezhda Vasilyevna!

Congratulations to the young.

Leading: Friends! This is the older generation of Konstantin's relatives and friends, and for their wise parting words, we invite you to raise your glasses! The presenter invites all those present and guests to raise their glasses to V. Ozayev's toast.

Leading: And we,
dear guests, we continue to congratulate the newlyweds, we continue to dignify the newlyweds, present them with kind words, present them with gifts, and shout the traditional “Kashun - bitter!” to them.

Leading: The older generation in every family means care, comfort and security! And the love, life experience and wisdom of the elders in the family is another, the most important, best support for a young family. The floor is given to the family of Konstantin's older sister - Baira and her husband Vladimir !

Congratulations to the young. At the end, the presenter should begin the ceremony of handing over the candle - the symbol of the family hearth.

Leading: Baira and Vladimir, for your words of kind parting words, we should raise our glasses!

Leading: Dear guests! Unfortunately, today, with us there are no closest and dearest people of Konstantin, his parents Polina Konstantinovna and Pavel Zergentievich, who have lived together in love and harmony for more than 30 years. But the family hearth continues to be supported by his elder sister Baira, and therefore it is high time for her, today, to pass the baton to the young from her good family hearth. Constantine and Julia, light this candle and feel free to make a wish. Try to keep the fire in your family, protect it and never forget about it!

To the melody of Arkady Mandzhiev "Green Tara" Bair and Volodya pass a candle. Young people light a candle.
It is desirable that the candle be thick, capable of burning for many hours, and spare candles should be placed next to it so that the fire on the table in front of the young does not go out throughout the wedding.

Leading: So one more family hearth is lit. Dear newlyweds! It just so happened for a long time that the keeper of the hearth has always been a woman. Pay attention, young people, that the candle fire is alive and beautiful, like love itself, but it goes out easily. And in order to preserve it for many years, you need to protect the light in time from drafts of resentment and rain of tears! By keeping the fire, you will keep your love! So let the fire of your love burn forever!

Leading: Friends! Let's raise our glasses to our parents.

The presenter invites all guests and invitees, standing to support, a toast to the parents.

Leading: We suggest raising your health charm

for those who raised this glorious couple.

Who in life did not know either sleep or peace.

for those who have saved great happiness for them!

And I will perform the favorite song of Polina Konstantinovna "Gurvn almn".

Concert number.

Guest performance plan:

Leading: And now we give the floor from the older generation of the Valetov family, relatives of the groom's mother. Mom's uncle is invited to congratulate the young VALETOV VASILY OCHIROVICH with his wife and his sister ELIZAVETA OCHIROVNA MANDZHIEVA.

Congratulations to the young.

Leading: The floor is given to my mother's uncle VYACHESLAV OCHIROVICH MANDZHIEV and his wife SVETLANA TIMOFEEVNA, the VASILIEV family.

Congratulations to the young.

Leading: On our impromptu stage, the gagashki of the Ozayev family are invited: GORIAEVS, OCHELAEVS, MANJIEVS (p. Tsagan Aman).

Congratulations to the young

Leading: The relay race of festive congratulations is taken by the Nagtsnr Konstantin, families: VALETOV, SAMTANOV, LOGAEV.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: Dear friends, I would like to precede the next congratulations with a small digression - the wedding events today began, as you know, from the very early morning, one might say, from dawn. The relatives and friends of our bride Yulia met this wonderful day in pleasant troubles in the distant, but now so close village of Achinery.

Leading: Let's welcome the honored guests of our celebration - art director, headed by the most respected person in the bride's family ________________!

The floor is yours, art director!

Leading: Konstantin and Julia, accept congratulations and wishes of love and peace, harmony and prosperity in your family on behalf of the bride's relatives and friends! And now there will be a gift for the matchmakers “Hood ovgnya dun”.

Concert number.

Leading: As they say, a tree is strong with branches, and a person is strong with roots. Our fiancé Konstantin is rich not only in his roots, his ancestors, but also in his family and friends. We invite the Pope's relatives: the MANJIEV, UTNASUNOV, GUCHINOV families.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: And now the floor is given to a large group representing the closest circle of relatives, whom we have divided into subgroups, cousins ​​and sisters of the groom's mother. For congratulations, I invite the families: NAKTANOVS, BOBRITSKY, DORDZHIEV, UBUSHAEV.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: The floor is given to the groom's mother's cousins ​​and sisters, the families: MANJIEV, SANJI-GORYAEV, BASANGOV from the village of Krasinskiy.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: The floor is given to the cousins ​​of the groom's mother, the families: ERDNI-GORYAEV, NIDZHIEV, MANJIEV, KAIBALDIE, SARSENGALIEV, BADNAEV, SHOVGUROV.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: And we continue our festive celebration! The floor is given to the SWATAM of the Ozayev family. I invite aunt TAYU UBUSHAEVA, aunt POLINA MANDZHIEVA.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: I invite matchmakers to our stage - the UBUSHIEV, BASANGOV family

Congratulations to the young

Leading: Friends! We join in the congratulations! Happiness and love to you young people! Harmony and family well-being! Let failures and problems pass your home! Always stay together, walk through life together and happily, to the delight of family and friends!

Leading: We continue our congratulations: “GOLDEN YOUTH” - Konstantin's cousins ​​and sisters - are invited to the microphone.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: And now the floor is given to MOM'S COLLEAGUES - MEAT MARKET STAFF

Congratulations to the young

Leading: And we continue our festive celebration! The word for congratulations is given to the SISTER'S COLLEAGUES - THE COLLECTIVE OF THE INTERDISTRIAL IFTS № 3 FOR THE REPUBLIC OF KALMYKIA (TAX INSPECTION).

Congratulations to the young

Leading: Who is even closer to family next to us, to whom we can turn without leaving our street. Of course, these are our beloved neighbors! A word to the Ozayevs' NEIGHBORS.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: Let's support our guests! Their congratulations are very similar to real astrological predictions! It remains to add that a new family was born today on a festive evening! And the arrangement of the stars promises her wisdom, artistry, poise and high fertility! Let's drink to the successes of the newborn family! ( Toast).

Leading: And I invite FRIENDS OF THE Ozayevs' FAMILY to our impromptu stage. Meet the BOSHEV family with thunderous applause.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: Family friend "- such a title, it still needs to be earned.

You gave us a dozen reasons to cherish this friendship.

Leading: And we pass our baton of congratulations to MOM'S CLASSMATS.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: The word for congratulations is given to the TEACHERS AND PARENTS OF CLASSMATS Konstantin.

Congratulations to the young

Leading: Dear guests, Have a seat and hello,

Watch and participate -

You will not have to lose heart

We will present the class!

CLASSMATS AND FRIENDS OF KONSTANTINA continue our wedding marathon!

The presenter announces a dance marathon. Dance melodies and songs sound.

Leading:
Take a look, dear guests, in what color you came to the wedding celebration. Who came in clothes Red? They are joyful, beautiful, independent people who value the fullness of life. Always ready for love, in the sense of a great feeling. They prefer to spend their vacations and vacations in the south. Who's in clothes white? Often naive, honest people with an unblemished reputation, kind and decent. They prefer to rest among the snowy plains and polar bears. ( Regarding the snow-white dress of the bride!).
Black color clothes suggests that we are faced with talented people who are able to enchant absolutely everyone. They love black caviar and black coffee. Sexually attractive, prolific in everything! They love to relax in the country with countless people in love with them. clothing of blue color guarantees their owners a noble origin, romance. These are loyal, glorious people, worried about literally everything and for everyone. They love to rest everywhere, just to fly by plane or sail by ship. Green color attire suggests that these are people overwhelmed by hope and dream. Always fresh and attractive. For recreation, they prefer steppe expanses. Who came in clothes yellow color? These people are pleasant, warm, romantic, but ... not easy. Gold is preferred as jewelry. They love to rest on the "Golden Sands". They like to listen to the "Golden Ring", they like to be called "Golden Ring" (this is for guests!).

Dear guests, this is all a joke, but as they say, every joke has a share ... a joke !! And as a result of the joke, we became a little closer and more understandable to each other, at least in terms of color!

A Kalmyk wedding is primarily a matchmaking, which is divided into three parts.

The first part is acquaintance

The elder of the community with the young man and his friends arrives at the house of the chosen girl. The delegation has three jugs of vodka and treats with them. The ritual "Tsatsl Tsatslgn" is performed and after this ritual it can be considered that the wedding will take place.

The second part is the big matchmaking

At this stage, the groom, accompanied by his father with the cloth and next of kin, pays a visit to the house of the chosen one. Here they arrange gatherings with national treats and negotiate the accompanying groom and the number of people, as well as make up a wedding menu and gifts.

The third part is the wedding day agreement

Several people gather and specify the date of the celebration.

Traditional rites

A Kalmyk wedding implies the observance of a certain number of beliefs. A few days before the holiday, they begin to prepare the chosen one for a new family life. Relatives come with gifts for the dowry. The girl's curl, nails, threads from the dowry are cut off and all this is burned. This is a symbol that the girl starts a new married life.

Interesting! Compare the traditions of the Buddhist wedding ceremony, etc.

At this time, preparations are underway in the house of a young guy. It must include an odd number of married men.

The arrival of the wedding procession to the house for the girl is associated with the observance of rituals. First of all, the products promised by the matchmakers are brought into the dwelling, and then only alcohol. With these gifts, the members of the delegation prove the seriousness of their intentions.

After the ceremonial part, all those present wash their hands, rinse their mouths and pray before the burkhan. And the time comes for a festive banquet, which, in turn, is also accompanied by national rituals.

wedding ceremony

A Kalmyk wedding is not only an identity, at this moment whole families, khotons, become related. Therefore, all the invitees try to prove themselves and conduct a series of tests for each other.

All guests celebrate the wedding until late at night and one of the friends from the groom's side must perform the ceremony. The ritual consists in touching the betrothed.

The next morning, while everyone is walking, a clever guy sneaks into the tent to the girl and touches her shoulder, thereby making it clear that it's time to go to her husband's house. The process takes place as imperceptibly as possible, otherwise the bridesmaids will laugh at the fellow. After the ceremony, the female half is divided into two parts. The married part sees off the girl, and the unmarried part keeps the bride with all her might.

Before leaving the father’s house, the girl’s mother says to bow before the parental Burkhans and drink homemade milk. They cover the bride's head with a scarf, this is a sign of a married girl and so that she would not be able to remember the road to the previous house. She leaves her father's house once and for all. At this time, the train is loaded with the girl's dowry.

But here a surprise awaits the guests from the groom's side, the bridesmaids have hidden part of the dowry, and now they will have to redeem these gifts. The messengers pay off with sweets. The female side of the groom takes the canopy behind which the young wife sat for the entire wedding ceremony.

The canopy is spread on the ground and can only be lifted during horse races, when it gets off the ground. Of course, this is involved and the groom is the first to pick up the canopy.

After observing all the rituals, the wedding train with the bride and groom leaves for the young man's new house, the Kalmyk wedding has come to an end.

Matchmaking as part of a wedding ritual occurs in a wide variety of cultures. From century to century, traditions and signs associated with this rite are passed on.

Through this custom, the families of the young agreed on the upcoming wedding, discussed the appropriate dowry.

Parents blessed their children for the upcoming marriage.

Russian traditions

Matchmaking according to Russian traditions is an obligatory, complex ritual with many of its own customs. First of all, young people needed to get parental approval.

When the son expressed his intention to marry a particular girl, or when the parents themselves chose a wife for their son, they always asked relatives for advice.

They collected information on an unfamiliar girl, tried to find out as much as possible about her. The parental blessing of the young was an integral part of a happy family life.

The older generation, in the main, focused on the material and class interests of the future spouse., therefore, if there were other options for marriage, then they tried to dissuade their son from a less advantageous union and arrange his fate as worthy as possible.

When the bride was approved by the groom, it was the turn of the matchmakers. In most cases, this role was played by the young man's father, less often - the groom himself or his older brother.

Professional matchmakers played a special role in Russia- people specially invited to matchmaking. Only such a person, sometimes better than newlyweds, could determine what is needed for their future life.

The folk wisdom “Choose not a bride, but a matchmaker” reflects how serious the attitude of the people towards this custom was. Professional matchmakers were divided into two categories:

• the first category did not benefit from marriage, their attitude was completely conscientious and unselfish, as the people said: “people get married, and their eyes shine”;
• the second category, in order to achieve a profitable marriage, could well cheat: "people boast - you can't climb, a matchmaker boasts - you can't jump on a horse."

During the ceremony, the conversation at first was completely detached from the wedding affairs, and only then, when such formalities were observed, they asked if the bride would agree to the marriage.

If the bride was supportive, she began revenge with a broom towards the stove, but if her answer was negative, then from the stove, as if driving away the guests who had come.

If the girl's parents considered the young man an unsuitable candidate, then the ceremony was carried out as follows: the groom was thanked for the honor that fell to him, but then they said that they were forced to refuse him, since their daughter was still too young for marriage.

When it was time to prepare for the wedding, the bride and her close friends had to prepare gifts.

The groom, in turn, was interested in what gift to present to the bride on their wedding day. At that time, the most common gifts were expensive fabrics, boots, boots.

Signs

The rite is associated with many signs that were observed by the ancestors.

In order not to jinx the young, matchmakers came after sunset.

When the matchmakers went to a meeting with their future relatives, a meeting with a young girl with water served as a good messenger for them, a cat that crossed the road was considered a bad sign.

The well-known omen “to marry in May - to suffer all your life” takes its roots from the times when this month was busy with sowing work, so it was said that in April they woo until the last day.

Also, attention was paid to the day of the week - so, on Wednesday and Friday - fast days, it was not supposed to think about such things as marriage.

The numbers mattered too. The number 13 was considered unlucky, but 3, 5, 7 and 9, on the contrary, were extremely successful.

Guests on the way to the bride were not supposed to start conversations with anyone, and when they arrived, before knocking, they imperceptibly touch the doorframe with their shoulder or hand.

As soon as the guests crossed the threshold, the door behind them was necessarily closed on a hook - this was done so that a stranger would not come in and jinx the upcoming sacrament.

It was a bad omen if the matchmaker sat down in the bride's house - it was believed that things would not work out right away. The same sign was also associated with the fact that young children can be born with gray hair - that is, it is too late to start walking.

She was also not supposed to eat or drink. If they eat, it was believed that children would suffer from gluttony, and if they drink, the children will grow up drunkards.

The matchmaker, conducting a conversation, so that the meeting would be resolved in their favor and “happiness would not run away,” tried to unnoticed by the others to touch the leg of the table.

Traditions on the part of the bride

The girl did not speak during the ceremony. She had her back to the guests who had come and raked the ash out of the oven.

There was a ritual for testing the bride. In the center of the room, the girl demonstrated her skills and talents.

For example, if she was a lace maker, then she showed her dexterity by throwing bobbins from hand to hand, and then demonstrated a lace towel made by her for a wedding.

The father of the bride joined the hands of the children as a sign of the blessing of their family life.

Traditions on the part of the groom

The groom very rarely participated in rituals, more often only his matchmakers did it. The groom was present, but in order not to spoil the ceremony, he did not enter into conversations.

When the ceremony was over, the groom and his parents must have discussed the bride.

In order to prevent their conversation from being heard from the bride's side, they went out onto the porch or in the vestibule. This was done even if the girl had been familiar to them for a long time.

When they returned, the girl's mother brought the young man a glass of drink. If the glass was completely drunk, then this meant that the wedding would take place.

If he refused or returned the glass unfinished, it said that the bride did not like it and the wedding between them would not take place.

Modern rite in Russia

In our time, of course, matchmaking does not have such an iconic ritual character. Most often, a young man first receives consent from a girl, and only after that he comes to get acquainted with her relatives.

During his visit to future relatives, the groom should not come empty-handed.- bouquets for a girl and her mother will be great gifts. The matchmaker can be the father of a young man or a close friend.

The bride's parents can express their consent to the marriage by joining the hands of the future newlyweds.

The bride also needs to visit the home of the groom's parents., and it will also not be superfluous to give the future mother-in-law some gift, for example, a bouquet of flowers.

Previously, it was believed that all the wedding expenses were borne by the groom's relatives. Now the costs and worries are distributed according to a common agreement, and most often the future newlyweds themselves take all the costs on themselves.

Customs of different peoples

Tatar customs

Matchmakers (kudalar) visit the bride's house for a ceremony, during which they ask about the bride and exchange gifts.

If the bridegroom is to the liking of the girl, she, through intermediaries, gives him an embroidered white shawl as a sign of her consent. The kudalar bride is also necessarily presented with gifts - very beautifully packaged and decorated sweets or jewelry.

Chuvash customs

The Chuvash traditionally organize this ritual in the spring; they always go to visit in an odd number. This is done in order to leave the bride's house in an even number - that is, to form a couple. Guests are also served in an odd number.

However, specially fried unleavened dough, rolled in the form of balls - yavacha - is served without counting, as a symbol of the desire for large offspring.

Armenian customs

Before going to visit the bride, the groom's parents ask the mediator midnord kin, who is also familiar with the bride's family, to persuade them to marry their daughter. After that, the mediator and close male relatives on the groom's paternal side are sent to the meeting.

According to the tradition of the Armenians, even if the bride's parents agree to marry her off, then they in no way talk about it directly, they are expressed allegorically (for example, "this handkerchief has now become yours"), after that they set the table with treats and celebrate.

Kazakh customs

In Kazakhstan, this custom is called kuda tusu. The groom's relatives go to the bride's house, where the girl's parents treat them to traditional dishes and they exchange the prepared gifts.

During the celebrations, where to tusu, all the upcoming costs associated with the wedding are discussed, as well as, which is of particular importance for the Kazakh people, the size of the kalym. Young people are not present at the time of the party.

Korean customs

Matchmakers (usikundiri) are sent in the morning to the bride's house on the appointed day in an odd number. The groom's mother should not be present in this ceremony, so she stays at home.

If the bride's side agrees to the marriage, then the young are declared the bride and groom, but everything takes place in a rather modest and quiet atmosphere - lavish celebrations are not supposed to be arranged at the same time.

Kalmyk customs

The groom, the elder and a friend with treats and vodka come to the bride on horseback. The elder must perform a ritual - for this he puts glue, white and yellow coins on the goddess, then opens the vodka and says wishes.

After all, preparations for the celebration begin. Later, the groom with his parents and other relatives go to the bride's house with treats and gifts in order to discuss the details of the upcoming wedding.

The next meeting of the parties allows you to finally agree and set a date for the wedding.

Many modern couples try to conduct a matchmaking ceremony before the wedding, of course, not in this form and rather symbolically, unlike our ancestors. But, of course, such correct, centuries-old traditions will be kept in history and celebrated by the next generations.

In the following video, you will learn how to conduct one of the matchmaking scenarios:

If you find an error, please select a piece of text and press Ctrl + Enter.

The way of life of the Kalmyk people has been forming for centuries. It was determined mainly by the work rhythm of life. The people also had their own moral criteria, their own unwritten code of politeness and cultural behavior of people - folk ethics. For example, if a young man was rude to an older person, it was considered tantamount to being rude to his parents.

The way of life of the Kalmyk people has been forming for centuries. It was determined mainly by the work rhythm of life. The people also had their own moral criteria, their own unwritten code of politeness and cultural behavior of people - folk ethics.

For example, if a young man was rude to an older person, it was considered tantamount to being rude to his parents.

When two people talk, and a third intervenes from the outside or overhears their conversation - it was very indecent. Any curiosity in general was considered indecent: peeping, eavesdropping.

When there is grief or misfortune in any family, and the one who came to their house raised a noise or a scandal, it is shameful for such a person.

When a person, meeting, cordially greeted his acquaintance, but he seemed not to notice and passed by - this was considered arrogance and was condemned by everyone.

If a guest after a tea-party threw the cup upside down, it was considered extremely indecent, because characterized him as an ungrateful person and meant that he would not come to visit these people again. Or when a person, having visited a guest and spent the night there, in the morning did not bother to say goodbye to the owners and, leaving, besides, slammed the door strongly - this meant the same thing.

The Kalmyks, like all peoples, had many traditional customs and rituals. Some of them remained almost unchanged, while others over time became obsolete, forgotten and disappeared. Many customs came from the depths of the centuries, they also expressed the craving of the common people to decorate their life, and their moral and aesthetic ideals, and ancient superstitions.

It was so customary, for example, that women in the morning opened the chimneys of the wagons from left to right; a person, leaving for work or on other matters, also walked around the hearth from left to right, they drove up to the destination from the left side, when they met a person, they passed to the left of him. That is, everything was done in the direction of movement of the source of life - the sun - from left to right.

Many customs were created and spread under the influence of religion. For the illiterate Kalmyks, Gelungs, Bagshis and Lamas were almost saints. They were strongly believed and respected very much. The ministers of the religious cult were literate people. The best of them were sent to Tibet and Mongolia to master Buddhist religious science. After studying there for several years, they returned home as the most revered people, with clergy and dignity.

The dark steppe Kalmyks spoke of them with admiration: “Look, not only in Chorya (the main temple of the Kalmyk clergy), but even in Tibet and Mongolia, they have visited, mastered the great religious science! "

People prayed to the Burkhans every day, went to the monastery (khurul) for divine services four or five times a year, made offerings to God - some with money, some with cattle, cleansed themselves of "sins", made offerings to earth, water, and fire. And, in any case, they turned to the clergy for instructions and instructions.

SENDING THE SOUL

When a person died in the family due to old age, illness or as a result of an accident, then a lama was necessarily invited to send the soul of the deceased to the next world.

The lama, who arrived to send the soul of the deceased, spread out a prayer book in front of him, read it aloud and at times rang a small bell. Then he made various figures of a man, a sheep, a cow, a horse and a camel from the clay or rye dough prepared for this occasion. After reading prayers over them, he blew and spat on every figurine, forcing all family members of the deceased to follow him.

After that, the lama asked one of them to throw all these figures to the north side of the wagon. At the end of the ritual, he said:

The soul of the deceased has been sent on the right path, it will not wander. Then the lama rolled up the prayer book, tied it with a cord and lightly hit the prayer book on the head of everyone present. At this he finished the requiem, for which he was rewarded with money and things. The rich gave animals.

TAMING AN EVIL LANGUAGE

When a child fell ill in a family, they first of all turned to Gelung for help. Gelung, examining the child and looking into the prayer book, established the disease: "An evil tongue darkens, you need to shorten it - and everything will pass."

Then the priest made one of the women twist a thin rope about a meter long from white and black sheep's wool. At one end of the rope, he made a loop, which he put on the neck of the sick child. The other end of the rope was held by a man with a sharp knife in his hand.

At the priest's command, he cut the rope in short pieces.

The priest said to the child: - Pray to God and the clergy!

(The child prayed, nodding his head in agreement).

The priest, reading the prayer, said:

Deliver, God, from the envy of people - cut off the evil tongue! (The man cut off a piece of rope.)

Deliver, God, from the poison of callous people - cut off the evil tongue! (The man cut off a piece of rope.)

Deliver, God, from the disease - cut off the evil tongue! (The man cut off a piece of rope.)

Deliver, God, from the envy of people who say that he is rich - cut off the evil tongue! (The man cut off a piece of rope.)

Deliver, God, from the envy of people who say that he lives with someone else's good - cut off the evil tongue! (The man cut off a piece of rope.)

Deliver, God, from all curses - cut off the evil tongue! (The man cut off a piece of rope.)

And so it went on until the rope ended.

Then the priest gave the order to remove the noose from the child's neck and, together with the previously cut pieces of rope, burn it and bury the ash at the threshold of the dwelling.

The child's parents, satisfied that the "evil tongue" was tamed, and the child was "freed" from the disease, made an offering to Gelung.

RESPECT FOR ELDERS

The Kalmyks have a long-established custom of treating elderly people, older comrades, and guests with respect. On this score, there are instructive Kalmyk sayings: "Respect the elder brother by an arshin, and the younger one by an inch," "A man has elders, and a fur coat has a collar."

These moral rules were followed from generation to generation and expressed in the following:

When an elder or a guest was getting ready for the journey, the young prepared him for the journey and saddled the horse;

When an elderly man entered the house, the young people supported him and opened the door for him;

Previously, an older or elderly young man did not enter the carriage and did not sit down;

When the elders spoke, the younger did not enter into conversations;

At weddings, festivals, housewarming and other solemn occasions, good wishes were pronounced first by the older ones, and then by the rest;

The daughter-in-law with her father-in-law was not supposed to take off her headdress and be barefoot;

The younger had to obey the elders, had no right to argue with them, raise their voice in their presence;

They gave way to the elderly.

Here it should be noted that pregnant women received special respect from those around them. If a young woman, for example, a daughter-in-law, was in a position, then even the father-in-law would give her way, saying at the same time: "Come in, dear! You have two souls, two hearts! .. "

There was such a good custom among our people - not to drink vodka for young people, and especially in the presence of elders. At holidays and weddings, vodka, or rather, moonshine (araka), was served only to elderly guests, the young were not given it. Boys and girls did without strong drinks: they danced, sang and played various interesting games. If anyone got drunk it was a shame. Such a young man was condemned for a long time, and he was ashamed of his wrongdoing. Therefore, elderly, experienced people always warned young people: "Vodka destroys everything except your own dishes." This saying does not lose its instructive meaning even now.

NEW HOUSING WISHES

Kalmyks often migrated from place to place in search of good pastures. Having settled in a new place, they made sure to arrange a treat for the elderly in order to receive a blessing from them. Old men and women pronounced good wishes - Yorels:

Live happily in a new place!

Let your house be like a palace with open doors, so that no one passes or passes by you, so that you always have guests and that you always have abundance!

And in our time this custom is observed. When a family moves into a new apartment, into a new house, the first thing they do is arrange a meal, invite all loved ones and listen to the wishes from relatives, friends, and comrades.

HIDDEN NAILS

The Kalmyks had a custom of hiding their nails cut off from their feet. This was done because there was a belief that nails from human feet are very fond of cows: with some instinct they find them everywhere and eat them when the Kalmyks wander with their cattle from place to place. Nails in the abomasum of a cow are not digested, but, caught with sharp ends, remain hanging on the walls of the stomach, causing pain to the animal.

The Kalmyks collected toenails cut off with a knife or scissors in a pile and buried them in the ground right in the wagon, tamping them with their heels and saying:

I won’t betray you to the cow, don’t betray me death!

Become a white marble rock, and I will become a gray-haired old man.

When the horns of the goat reach the sky, and the tail of the camel reaches the ground,

I will come to you on a horse, bring lamb as a gift.

Only you don’t betray me to death, and I won’t betray you to the cow!

PURIFICATION BY FIRE

Nomadic Kalmyks hibernated from November to March. With the onset of spring, when the snows began to melt and the steppes were covered with green grass, the Kalmyks left their winter quarters for summer pastures.

Before leaving the wintering place, the wagons and household belongings were folded onto carts, loaded onto camels. Bonfires were lit in two places. Old unusable things and a handful of salt were thrown into them. Between these bonfires we drove by ourselves and drove the cattle away.

This so-called "Purification by Fire" was carried out to get rid of pathogenic microbes and all sorts of junk accumulated over the long winter days. They prayed to the fire - to these cleansing fires, attaching great importance to the ritual.

WEDDING

The wedding was, of course, the most striking event in the life of not only two related families, but also for their loved ones, for the khotons where they lived. Before picking up a girl from someone else's distant khoton, the groom's parents sent a "scout" there. He had to get to know the girl's parents, to find out little by little what the state of their household is, what is the authority of this family in the khoton.

And most importantly, when he saw a girl, he had to try, as a result of his own observations, to determine her character: she is rude or polite, gloomy or cheerful, hardworking or lazy.

In the pocket of such a "scout" was a dry "nut" - the droppings of a kid, which he, seizing the moment, imperceptibly put in a thimble hanging on the perch of a grate near the girl's bed. A few days later, the cunning man certainly found an excuse to visit the same wagon again and check if the girl had used a thimble. If there was nothing in the thimble, it means that the girl used it, sewed something, it means that she is a craftswoman ...

For the first time, the "scout" falls into the wagon of the girl's parents as if by accident, they say, he is looking for a horse that has strayed from the herd: "Have you seen, good people? "

Then such a guest asks for an overnight stay, and in the morning, waking up at dawn, pretends to be still asleep and quietly watches the girl.

If she gets up before everyone else and, quickly putting herself in order, runs off to fetch water, and then helps her mother milk the cow and manage the household, then she is hardworking, and besides, she respects her parents. A good hostess will be! And if the girl is, moreover, polite, knows how to resourcefully and cleverly answer several questions asked to her as if by the way by the "scout", then we can say that the question of matchmaking has already been resolved. If a girl gets up later than her mother, walks sleepy and untidy, yawns and doesn't put her hands on anything, there can be no question of matchmaking.

The Kalmyks' wedding, first of all, was associated with significant material costs. They prepared for this event very carefully and for quite a long time - the preparation sometimes dragged on for up to a year, or even up to two years. During this time, both sides discussed who and what would cook for the young family: the groom's parents prepared the frame of the wagon with all felt coverings and various accessories for it, the bride's parents - all the furnishings necessary for the home: beds, chests, iron, boxes, all kinds of utensils , carpets, patterned shirdyks, bedding, beautiful braid that encircles the wagon outside.

When the preparations were over, the wedding (khyurm) began, consisting of three main solemn ceremonies.

The first ceremony is the first visit of the groom to the wagon of the bride's parents. Two young men on horseback, who arrived with arak and treats for the children, informed their parents about it in advance.

For this day, both sides prepared diligently: the parents did not send the groom to visit with empty hands - they fried bortsoks, bought sweets and gingerbread, cooked the carcass of a ram. The participants of the trip were notified in advance. They sent the bride's family a slab of Kalmyk tea and two nutmegs, as well as a white scarf with silver and copper coins tied in one of its corners (as a sign of unity) and some koumiss (as a sign of gratitude). Finally, the groom and his friends (at least a dozen men) set off, as a rule, on horseback. They were accompanied by a cart laden with gifts.

The trip was led by the eldest of the groom's close relatives, who knows the wedding ceremony well, as well as the corresponding proverbs, sayings, jokes, wedding songs. The whole group stopped, before reaching the bride's khoton, and sent out a horseman to warn the girl's parents about the approach of khyurms. When the messenger returned, the group continued on their way: in front of them were two or three riders, led by the elder, behind them a cart with gifts, followed by horsemen with the groom.

We drove into the khoton in the direction of the sun. They were met by men - relatives of the girl: after meticulously checking the presence of all the items required according to the wedding ceremony, they invited guests to the wagon. It should be noted that the absence of any one customary item entailed a postponement of the wedding.

On the right side of the wagon, men were seated, led by the eldest, on the left, women, led by the eldest, sat in a place of honor. The young people gathered together with the bride in another wagon.

According to custom, the arrivals first inquired about the health and well-being of all family members and relatives of the bride, asked about the household, talked about the weather. Only after that did the meal begin. Young women filled their elders' pipes, served tea in bowls, young men served the brought meat and arak. The old people said good wishes: "Let the young build a wagon on a hill, let there be a leash for cattle on a grassy place, and let them live in a green valley without wars, without any disasters! .. "

In the evening, the bride's parents cooked, in turn, a ram carcass, but not one, and the fun continued: they danced, sang, joked ... The groom observed the generally accepted rules of decency: he behaved sedately and modestly, refrained from alcoholic beverages.

After long requests and exhortations from the guests, the parents allowed the bride to appear to those present. She entered, accompanied by two of her friends, looking down and bowing her head, trying not to attract attention to herself. She was greeted standing, and the elder expressed his good wishes to the bride. The guests asked her to serve the elder a bowl of tea, fill his pipe with tobacco, sing and dance. The bride fulfilled the wishes of the guests, who stormily thanked her and presented her with money, and when she danced, they threw coins at her feet.

Then the most important part of the khurm began, on which the whole fate of the wedding depended. Everything suddenly came down to how much the elder (khyurmin akhlach) knew folklore. Serving him meat, they put the twenty-fifth vertebra of a ram in a plate. After eating the meat and reaching the vertebra, the elder had to tell all nine legends. If he forgot something or got confused, shame fell on his hoton. The owner of the house could refuse to marry off his daughter because of a bare-haired elder, or go to fine the groom's relatives, obliging, in addition to all the agreed gifts, to add a saddled horse.

But then the elder with honor got out of the situation, and he was served with a scapula. Now, by the signs of the shoulder blade, he had to determine the character of the owner, and even say what winter is ahead, whether the sheep bases are spacious, whether the owner has a wide path for cattle, whether the chef is rich in his cauldron. If the elder guessed correctly, he was rewarded and it was believed that they had found good and wise new relatives for his daughter. So they feasted until dawn.

The feast continued the next day: guests from the groom's side were invited in turn by all the bride's relatives, treating everyone with what they could. But now the second day was running out, and the guests, having uttered farewell toasts and thanking for the hospitality, left.

The second ceremony is the second visit. The female group of visitors included a woman experienced in such matters and one of the groom's young daughters-in-law (most often the wife of the older brother). They brought with them sweets, two carcasses of rams (boiled and raw), bortsoks, chintz. In the kibitka of the bride's parents, the cutting of the brought fabrics took place, then there they sewed wedding heating, pillowcases, clothes (emskül) for the bride's parents.

The reception of guests took place in the same established order as on the first arrival. The party, which was arranged at the end of the work, was accompanied by playful conversations and games. When the guests were going home, they were presented with all sorts of gifts: beshmet, fabric cuts, scarves, embroidered pouches and purses. Wealthy parents presented fur, merlushky coats as a gift.

The third ceremony was the ceremony of taking away the bride. This day was appointed in advance. The period of stay of the groom's relatives in the bride's parents' khoton, and the time of day when the bride was supposed to be taken out of the parental house, and the color of her clothes, and the year of birth of the man who first touches her with his hand, and the color of the horse on which the girl was to be taken from home.

The bride's parents were informed about all these intricacies by the horsemen, who, returning with an answer, took with them the accessories prepared for the wagon of the young.

The groom's parents set up a white wagon for the young family, and relatives, friends and acquaintances gave everything they could. Gifts were also prepared for the bride's family.

The bride's parents gathered for a family council family and friends to decide on the preparation of a dowry and gifts for the groom's family. The quantity and quality of the dowry depended on the financial situation of the family. It should be noted that usually parents prepared a dowry for their daughter from an early age.

During the pre-wedding preparations, parties for boys and girls were held in the bride's khoton. At these parties, various dances and ritual songs were performed, of which the Kalmyk people have many. Such parties lasted until the wedding itself, since almost every day the bride was invited in turn by her relatives and friends, giving her gifts and treating her friends and relatives. The girl, in turn, presented her friends: she gave scarves to girls, and embroidered pouches and purses to young men.

On the wedding day in both khotons, everyone, without exception, from children to old people, put on their best clothes to participate in the celebration. The best dombra players were invited, for which sometimes horses were specially sent to neighboring khotons. Everyone went to the wedding - both invited and not invited, as they say: "Even a skull rolls to the wedding." And everyone who came should have been satisfied with the treat.

And so guests (at least twenty people, mostly men) went to the bride's hoton. They were carrying the agreed amount of meat, araki, and delicacies.

The bride's parents were already ready to receive guests. The festivities were held in the same order as the previous ones. Only this time, the guests came during the day, until sunset, and stayed all night, trying not to fall asleep, so as not to oversleep that time at dawn, when the skin patterns on the palm are still slightly visible and when it will be necessary to take the bride to the groom's house.

The most dexterous, well-singing, beautifully dancing and sharp-witted guys were sent for the bride. And this is because in the bride's hoton they could at any moment undergo all kinds of tests: how they dance, and how they sing, and how they solve all kinds of riddles, puzzles ...

In short, there was a two-way competition in the art of intelligent dialogue, dexterity, memory. Young people on both sides dressed smartly, their horses were also decorated. Naturally, the girls surreptitiously watched the guys.

The fun lasted all night, and at dawn the guests tried to quickly take the bride away, which they often did not succeed in immediately: the bride's friends and young guys from her khoton tried to detain them as long as possible, hiding the bride's things. The guests carried out the dowry, laid them on the cart, and at this time they were showered with blows of lashes and tashmaks (whips) by women and youth huddled around them. Then one of the men entered the wagon who was supposed to be the first to touch the bride with his hand. Those gathered prevented him from doing this, sometimes inflicting quite serious blows. There and then there was a farewell of mother and daughter. The mother served her daughter a cup of milk or kumis (chigyan) and, kissing, admonished her with a sad song:

Drink your red tea, childhood dreams - until dawn.

You will be sad by chance - you light a pipe.

Do not bask now - you are not with your mother, daughter:

The land is alien, believe me, deaf, as if the night.

Where there are herds of boars - walk quietly.

Never reveal your soul to a stranger!

After a while, the daughter will sing to the mother in response:

The blue-black horse is easily curbed by me.

Like a swallow, I'll fly home to you.

Already with a golden mane, fragrant like Erveng,

The horse stands, saddled, ready to leave captivity.

Oh, my pacer, fly over the edge of the village!

I grew up on your back as a rider.

Carry to your home, my raven, -

I will fly to my mother like a butterfly in the spring.

There are no more hugs than hers in the world!

I started to miss my mother so much ...

But the man appointed in advance nevertheless touched the girl's hand, jumped out of the wagon, jumped on the horse and waited, sitting behind the saddle prepared for the bride. After that, the groom's friends entered the wagon and, overcoming the resistance of others, took the bride and put her in the saddle. They took her outside the khoton, where a saddled horse was prepared and harnessed camels and horse carts awaited, and handed the bride over to the groom's family, who accompanied her to her new home. Among those accompanying there was certainly a young daughter-in-law or a relative of the groom's father.

Having completed this ceremony, the representatives of the groom's side, joyful and satisfied, went home with the bride. They were accompanied by several guys on festively decorated riding horses - representatives from the bride's side. When the groom's house was 5-6 kilometers away, both sides spurred their horses and started galloping.

The whole khoton greeted both their own and guests: both old and young came out in smart clothes. One of the most beautiful girls of the khoton stepped forward and waved a handkerchief over her head, in one corner of which silver and copper coins were tied. Each of the galloping tried to come first and hurried the horse with all his might. The greeters constantly cheered the riders, shouting and hooting. And the one who flew on his horse first, at a gallop snatched the scarf from the hands of a beautiful girl - this was a prize for winning the races in honor of the bride.

Then young women and girls from the groom's side met the bride - they took her off the horse (or cart) and led her in the direction of the sun into a wagon specially set up for the young. Two horsemen were carrying in front of them a blue canopy - tsenkr keshg. The bride's dowry was brought into the wagon, the future hostess was brought in and seated behind the curtain, where she was surrounded by girls. To the right of the door sat women, to the left - men, all in order of seniority. The wedding feast began in the groom's hoton.

In the second half of the day, rituals were performed to receive the bride in the husband's parental home: the young daughter-in-law worshiped the hearth of his relatives, Burkhans, the golden sun - the source of light and warmth, the spirit of the ancestors. The tibia with an alchik, laid in front of the girl, symbolized the wish of her son, who would play alchik.

And, finally, the newlywed bowed to her father and mother, during which the men accompanying the bride tossed them with pieces of a fat tail garden from a full bowl. After the ritual bows, the guests accompanying the bride asked if the parents agreed to accept the bride.

As soon as the young woman crossed the threshold of the wagon, the comic rite of pulling the lamb skin began: the guests pulled by one end, from the wagon, the groom's relatives - by the other, inside the wagon. When the skin was torn (not without the help of a knife, of course) into two parts, its outer half was thrown over the wagon towards the north, and the half that remained inside the wagon was placed on the right side of the wagon. Having crossed the threshold of her new home, the young mistress threw a piece of bacon and dung into the fire of the hearth. All those present at the same time wished the young people happiness, health, heirs, etc.

The young woman was again planted behind a canopy with young girls - after all, she was still in girlish clothes.

After sunset, the youth continued to have fun, moving to another wagon. And only the elders remained in the parents' wagon. They continued to feast, jokes and folk songs sounded, verbal contests continued, in which everyone tried to show their resourcefulness and wisdom.

Two elderly women walked to the bride in the newlyweds' wagon. Here they unraveled her maiden braid (from now on she will wear two braids with shiverdyks), put it on young women’s clothes. Then the women brought the groom to the wagon. The young were left alone.

In the morning, the bride was invited to the wagon by her father-in-law and mother-in-law. Here she made tea and brought the first bowl to her father-in-law. He pronounced a good wish and gave the daughter-in-law a new name, and returned the bowl to her, but with the money. The bride's relatives presented the groom's parents with the gifts they brought.

The wedding feast lasted for several days. Saying goodbye, the groom's parents presented, in turn, gifts to all the guests accompanying the bride, making no exception for anyone. This was the end of the wedding ceremony.

GOING ON THE WAY - WOW A CORNER

Human life is associated with movement. Every day he goes on the road. Whether it is short or distant - it already depends on the purpose for which he crosses the threshold of his house. As the Kalmyks say: "Emd kunyas kutsyakh kerg tasrdgo bolzhana. Emd byyasndyan bayrlkh kergtya. That burn-tolga mend byyakhlya, kerg kutsyad byyadg, kutsyakh kerg byanya gizh biidyan dya avhm bish." What does it mean: "A living person does not end up with business. And you just need to rejoice in this, not being annoyed that they are. After all, the ability to do business is also an indicator of a person's health." And in order for your deeds to be completely successful, let us recall several old Kalmyk customs associated with a long journey.

Whether you are going on vacation, on a business trip, to marry a bride or to enter a foreign institute, wish your loved ones or yourself good luck. And this is how it is done. First of all, it is desirable that an old person (grandfather or grandmother) pronounce a good wish (yoryal):

"Yovzhah haalgchn olzyatya bolzh,

Kerg - uulchn kutszh,

Mornyan chiknd nar urgazh,

Aim sting ergulzh,

Amuln mend hyarirhball! "

That is: "May your road be happy,

May your deeds be fulfilled

Let the sun shine on your way

To be calm and healthy

You came home. "

Then a person setting off on the road must necessarily pray to God - bow three times, accompanying this ritual with the prayer: "May my road be white, and may my deeds come true." Kalmyk tea is usually brewed before the road. The first cup is poured to God (dejezh), then to all those present on the wires, who, accepting a bowl of tea, must present the departing person with a white coin (it is believed that a white coin opens a white road - the road of well-being). Immediately after drinking tea, you need to drink deezh (tyavsn deejyan khuradmn). Then remove the ladle (Shang) from the pan. If something is being cooked on the stove, you cannot leave. You need to put out the fire or wait for the food to cook. And if he waited, be sure to try the prepared food. If a person gives up on this custom and leaves, then something will definitely happen on the way, because he has committed a sin.

Having left the threshold, a person should not look back, much less come back. This is a bad omen (deeds will not come true). Go on the road calmly: do not fuss, do not swear (kuunlya tsuugdmn bish), but keep a good mood (sadkltavar, jarlzsm chiryatagar) - then the road will be clear and everything will be fine. Otherwise, the whole road will be "bumpy". And just before leaving, the departing person is given a drink or a sip of milk (tsagan idyan). This custom is considered special among the Kalmyks, opening the white road. It must be observed when the bride is taken away from the parental home. Thus, the parents wish their daughter a happy life (bolad byiasn ter).

Further, the departing person must step over the threshold with his right foot. This is also of great importance, because he, as it were, wishes himself a joyful return. After leaving the door of the house, you must go to the right, even if the road leads to the left. The right side, the right leg, the right hand are of special importance for the Kalmyks, so you need to take at least three steps to the right, and then turn to the right place. Previously, they walked around their house in a clockwise direction, then bowed to every corner and only then set off on the road. This custom was honored during the time of Jangar in the country of Bumba. Bogatyrs, setting off on their way, bypassed the khan's palace and bowed at every corner, touching their foreheads (yade avad).

And, finally, after the person has left, a sharp object (knife or scissors) must be put on his bed with the tip forward (from the door), which must lie like this until the owner arrives. Our ancestors said that devils attack an ownerless bed, and they are afraid of a sharp object. For three days in a row after the person has left, you cannot take out the trash. This is explained as follows: along with the garbage, the happiness of the left family member is thrown away (khogta hamdan gertyas ter yovsn kuunya kisgn khaigj oddg). If you do not take out the trash, then the happiness of the person who has left settles in the house (kemr askhlgo biaakhlya, ter kuunya kishgn hertn biaakhmn bolzhana).

Earlier, when the Kalmyks lived in wagons, they carried water in buckets from the river and wells. The slops were taken out of the wagons and poured in all directions. And here it was necessary to know in which direction to throw the water out of the bucket. If a person from the family left for the west, then the dirty water should be poured towards the east, that is, in the opposite direction. In this case, you need to know the following: after the one who has left, you cannot pour out, throw out the liquid, because, they say, he will not come back. And the one who left home on business should throw a white coin on the land where he arrived and say the following words: "En mini irzh buusn gazr nand ach-tusan kurgthya, sansn sanam kutsthya!" Which means: "May this land give me strength and success, may my plans come true." And then your road will be kind and bright.

Russian Civilization